Weddings, y’all. They sometimes feel as if they take over the Am I The A$$hole sub, because they apparently make formerly rational human beings act like complete nuts.
This OP is a guy with a large friend group, money to burn, and a generous attitude. So, when he was invited to the wedding of an acquaintance he accepted, and also told them he’d like to get them a (pretty expensive) gift.
I(32m)was invited to a wedding of an acquaintance of mine named Molly a few months ago. I’m not super close to her or her fiancé, but I love weddings so I said yeah I’ll go.
Now, the relevant part here is that I have a very good career and make an excellent living. Plus I love giving gifts and splurging a bit. So, I spoke with Molly and her fiancé and promised them a custom made gaming pc since they game together.
They were very happy, and thanked me a lot . The price of the pc would come out to be a little over $1500, not counting the monitor I was willing to throw in.
Then, he was uninvited.
The bride said the reason was costs, but he learned from a friend that it was actually to make room for some of the groom’s family that wasn’t originally set to come.
A two months ago, Molly told me that unfortunately I had to be uninvited to the wedding as part of a cost cutting measure. She apologized, but assured me it was only because of cost. I was upset, but let it go.
Then I found out a week or so later from a mutual acquaintance that was still going that Molly told her she had to cut people because she needed the invites for some of the groom’s family who decided to come.
I was pissed, so I decided to not give Molly the PC I promised.
OP received a call after the ceremony asking about the gift (cheeky!) and said he wasn’t going to give it to them, seeing that he did not attend the wedding.
Molly’s wedding happened two weeks ago and from what I can tell, it was a nice ceremony. Afterward she actually texted me asking if we can talk about when the pc would arrive. I asked if we could call, she said yes. I told her that since I didn’t go to the wedding that I wasn’t going to get her a gift.
We had a long argument, where she said I was being petty and that I was holding it against her that I couldn’t come and that I made a promise. I didn’t tell her what I knew because I wanted to protect the person who told me.
The friend went off the rails and some of their mutuals agree that OP is being petty.
She called me a petty AH and complained to our friend group. I explained to a few select people the whole story, most agreed with me, but some said that weddings cause people to make very tough decisions that aren’t personal.
Now I’m doubting myself, maybe it wasn’t personal and I’m just being petty, but she did lie to me and uninvited me while still expecting an expensive gift from me.
So reddit, AITA?
Is he, though? You know Reddit is going to weigh in!
The top comment says the answer is simple, if not sweet.
Image Credit: Reddit
This person says the bride is really angry with herself.
Image Credit: Reddit
This commenter says OP missed out on a great opportunity.
Image Credit: Reddit
Plenty of people thought the bride definitely made the wrong decision, given what she knew.
Image Credit: Reddit
They say uninviting someone is tacky, regardless of the reason.
Image Credit: Reddit
I agree with the last person, honestly.
You don’t un-invite guests. You find a way to make it work.
