Most of us will never really know the secrets of the military in this country.

Sure, we can speculate and we’ve heard rumors here and there, but today we’re gonna get the straight dope from folks on AskReddit.

Take a look and see what you think.

Do you see anything?

“A friend of mine in the special forces told me since they are out in the field a lot, they get plenty of ticks.

And while you can inspect yourself fairly good, you can’t inspect everything , so they pair up and spread their cheeks, and your mate has to stare in to your anus to check you for ticks in there.

Not very glamorous.”

Sad.

“Our oceans are loaded with garbage.

LOADED.

I would watch the long trail of garbage follow my ship, in the wake, as crew dumped the shit off the fantail. Every single day. Miles and miles of trash. And this was just one ship.

This was just one nation. Our oceans are full of garbage that will take centuries to erode. Our waters are littered with s**t that fish are eating and d**ng from.”

That doesn’t sound good.

“Our computers don’t look or function anything like they do in the movies.

It takes me 15 mins to a half hour to log into my computer and when I do good luck opening Outlook or anything else.

This is well known amongst all service members. The worst computers I’ve ever used in ANY job.”

Hurting.

“The amount of unreported injuries to Doc or to command…….thus leading to lifelong issues. On the other hand, if you do go to Doc about an issue, you’ll be berated and told you are lying about an issue to get out of duty/PT.

Was ignored and told I was lying about back/sciatic issues for months by Doc. Jumped chain of command, went to my Captain, had an MRI/Xrays of my lower back, and a month later had a microdisectomy of my L5.

Damage was done, medically ineligible to re-enlist, 7 years later, and have to get a spinal fusion due to severe disk degeneration and chronic sciatic pain and permanent nerve damage.”

Sounds like prison.

“There’s a lot of s**ual a**se, a lot of blackmail, a lot of covered up r**es, a hell of a lot of cheating, coercion, threats, etc.

There’s also plenty of smuggling, fraud, theft, and so on.

It always makes me laugh when people romanticise the military and troops as honorable, professional and brave. I joined as soon as I was 18 and being around such people damaged my perception of society in general. I met a handful of decent people in 10 years, though.

I thought “It’s probably the same ratio of d**kheads to normals in civilian street”, but.. no, that’s not true. I’ve met way more serious criminals in the military than I have as a civilian.

But the worst thing about it all is that if it can be covered up it will be. Officers get the best treatment in this regard, but make no mistake, if the behaviour/crime becomes too public and it threatens the PR of the services, the only way you’re covered is if you’re a royal, or close friend of one.”

Debauchery.

“I was in the navy in the early 1990s.

I spent a total of a few months in the Philippines and Thailand. We were handed a box of condoms before we left the ship. Some of the things I saw:

Walk into a bar and have 5-10 girls run up to you to try to get you to pay their bar fine (rent them for the night).

Walk into a massage parlor and see 30 women behind glass with numbers on their shirts and you picked one.

A bar where women shoot ping pong balls out of their vajayjays, pull strings of razors blades out of them, or stick a whole banana up and drop out slices.

A game called “smiles” where a woman would go under a table and take turns going down on whoever was there. The first one to smile paid for a round.

I had friends wake up while getting a tattoo with no recollection up to that point, other friends sleep with ladyboys (with or without their knowledge), and others who had no idea how many women they had s** with. Me and my buddy were chased out of a bar by a screaming, knife wielding pr**titute and nobody even looked up from their beers.

Looking back, it was legitimately scary the freedom we had for debauchery. The Hangover Part 2 came close, but it was still very tame compared to back then.”

I believe it.

“I heard of an admin guy who had his wife shoot him in the leg and blame it on a home invasion so he wouldn’t have to get deployed.”

Drag show.

“The Royal Marine Commandos, some of the toughest soldiers in the world, have a long history of dressing in “women’s rig”.

Basically on nights out, they dress as women. Makeup, dresses, tights, the full thing. God have mercy on the civilians that make fun of them for it though.

Since the times that everybody has camera phones, the higher ups have tried to put a stop to it to “protect the dignity” of the service but it still happens.”

Awful.

“The VA will make every effort to screw you out of benefits. My college professor is the best example of this.

Dude survived two separate IED attacks and was left with permanent nerve damage that caused him immense pain. It took him three years of fighting and begging before any doctor would even see him, at this point he stopped going through the VA for doctor visits and was paying out of pocket to seek out any medical attention.

After a total of five years of pain, suffering, and taking any help he could get from doctors. They finally fixed his problem by amputating one of his legs.”

Not what it seems.

“It is 100000% not what anyone that hasn’t served would think it is.

Drug use, crime, a**aults (of all kinds), etc. Most never see any sort of actual danger as far as war goes. Maybe “deployed,” but never actually do anything.

The veterans you see lined up at Applebees on Veteran’s Day? Only time they ever touched their weapon was when they were at the range. You’ve seen more combat trying to get a 3 year old to bed.”

Yikes, I can’t believe some of these!