Call me old-fashioned, but I say that if you’re a guy and you’re taking a lady out for a first date, you should pay.
But that’s just me!
What do you think are unspoken rules on a first date?
Here’s what AskReddit users had to say.
1. Bad idea.
“Don’t drink too much.
Had a date like this. Within the first 90 minutes they had taken like three shots, and were on their third drink.
I understand wanting to calm your nerves, but d**n. The whole “You need to play catch up LOL” isn’t as cute as you think it is.
We did not go on any other dates.”
2. You stink!
“Take a shower before you go.
And take it easy with the perfume/cologne.
Your date shouldn’t smell you before they see you.”
3. Okay…
“My husband said that years before he met me, he went on a lunch date with a girl. She wanted to go to Olive Garden, so he obliged.
This girl had FOUR bowls of the endless soup or whatever they call it, and then orders her entree to go because “that’s how you get ’em!”
There was no second date.”
4. Totally clueless.
“Both people should know that it’s a date.
My clueless story: I (a guy) knew another guy from work who asked me out on a double date with two women he knew. I am not much one for blind dates but it seemed like fun. The women were nice, and all of us went out to a movie and dinner.
I was trying to figure out which of the women was my date, when, it suddenly dawned on me the middle of dinner that I had been missing something: the women were a couple, and I was the other guy’s date.
Clearly some signals had been missed here. I started blushing and then laughing, and I apologized, saying I was a very clueless straight guy. I am sure my gay buddy was surprised and maybe a bit embarrassed too, but it made for a memorable evening out…”
5. Definitely.
“Never make the other person carry the conversation.
You’re both here to make an effort and give each other the respect.
If you both want different things then let it be said after. No need to hurt someone’s self respect for your ego.”
6. Agreed.
“Don’t go to the movies or a fancy dinner on your first date if you don’t already know this person.
The movies is a place where you sit in silence for 2 hours staring straight ahead. That does not give you any opportunity to get to know the other person.
A sit down dinner can be perfectly fine, but if you know within the first 10 minutes that you have no desire to spend any more time in this person’s presence, you’re stuck through the rest of the meal.
First dates should always be intentionally short with an option to extend. Coffee, froyo, drinks, things that can turn into an hour of talking or “would you like to grab a bite to eat?””
7. Oops.
“Don’t excuse yourself to go to the bathroom and then accidently think about your ex while in there, have to fight back tears, and then come back to the table after way too long, with puffy red eyes.
Oops.”
8. Keep it simple.
“If you don’t know the person very well, then for the first date, go for coffee or ice cream.
Do not go out for something that takes long because if you realize within the first five minutes you don’t like them, it will be hard for you to escape.
If you like them, you can then suggest doing something longer.”
9. All of this is good.
“Dress according to the kind of date you’re having, don’t dress too formal or too casual.
Take a shower and use cologne, but dont use too much.
Dont vent about all your problems.
No cellphone.
Don’t eat too much, dont drink too much al**hol.
Let her talk and listen to what she says, don’t try to be the focus of every topic.
Show interest in what she says, but dont be too obsessed about anything, go with the flow.
Politics and religion are a no-no, usually.”
10. Listen up!
“33 y/o guy here. The 7 B’s come to mind.
1: Be honest. 2: Be clean and well groomed. 3: Be interested. 4: Be interesting. 5: Be polite. 6: Be responsible. 7: Be yourself (unless you’re an idiot. If you are, stop dating and start working on yourself)
Here’s a subset of rules for the uninitiated that relate to the seven B’s:
Dress appropriately (see rule 2). Whoever asked pay unless there’s an agreement (polite). Don’t get dr**k unless you both get dr**k (see rule 5). Bring protection (responsible). Neither of you owe each other anything. It’s okay if you don’t vibe well together (see rule 1). You’re not a s**t if you bang on the first date. Neither is the other.
#1 rule… no expectations.