There are no shortage of stories on Reddit or anywhere else about terrible mother-in-laws – to the point that it’s become a trope that no one really assumes is fake.
OP is a mother, and one of her sons has a wife who decided to stay home after they began having children. They have three. OP was also a stay-at-home mom but everything was split in the mornings and evenings, she had Sundays off, and frequent date nights.
I’m 60 and bad with the whole text thing on mobiles so I’m hoping I won’t be judged on my grammar
Here’s the important background my daughter in law (32) and son(33) have 3 children aged 3 years 2 years and 4 months .
He convinced her to be a stay at home mom and sell her business by telling her how good of a childhood he had and how happy my marriage was without telling her (which I today found out) that our arrangement was everything before 9am and after 5pm was split 50/50.
Sunday was my day off and I was brought out twice a week.
So, when her DIL called saying she wouldn’t be able to do a spa day they had planned because her husband (OP’s son) decided to go out with friends instead, OP was shocked.
On to the story- on my last visit I noticed my daughter in law was struggling mentally so I, my sister (55f) and her girlfriend (53) pulled our money together and paid for a spa weekend for them while we’d babysit the kids for her birthday last weekend.
I was preparing on Thursday evening for the kids to arrive when my dil rang me holding back tears saying they’d won’t be going because my sons friend came to town and he said he wanted to spend the weekend with his friends catching up.
I pressed her a little and I’m talking a little about her situation , she came clean about him doing no chores,no date nights and her basically doing all of the child care because “that’s what stay at home moms do”
I was honestly disgusted.
She sent her DIL to the spa with a bunch of spending money and went to find her son.
I convinced her to drop off the kids at my place and bring a friend to the spa I even dipped into my savings to give her €500 to buy herself something nice.
When she dropped off the kids I begged her to tell me where my son was. After 5 minutes she told me the bar.
She left for the spa while I left for the bar (she knew I was going there and knew my sister/my sister in law were taking care of the kids).
When she did, she tore him a new one.
Here’s were I might be the jerk.
I went to the bar were he and his friends were, I sat down next to the Group and asked my son “did I fail you as a mother or was it your father because we both thought your partner comes before your silly drunk friends.”
Long story short I humiliated him and got myself banned from a bar.
Now, he’s saying she should have minded her own business, but should she have?
My dil said she will be taking the kids to her parents when she gets back tomorrow and my son is calling me an jerk for humiliating him/ sticking my nose in his marriage.
Maybe I should have stayed out. I don’t know.
I bet Reddit is going to have big opinions on this!
The top comment says this sounds like just what the doctor ordered.
Others wanted to reassure OP she had been a good parent, despite this hiccup.
This person is hoping her intervention will be a wakeup call.
Because everyone agrees there’s no excuse for the son’s behavior.
They say it’s no surprise her son was upset but oh well.
This is the mother-in-law we all want and need.
I hope all of the boy moms out there are taking note.