There are a ton of different diet and lifestyle choices out there, and every one is valid.
Also if it’s not your choice, it’s also kind of none of your business.
OP and her family are vegans for many reasons, one of which is their health. Her fiance’s family eats meat, so when putting together a menu for the wedding, OP thought it was a no-brainer to include both meat and vegan options.
My fiance (31 male) and I (25 female) are getting married soon. There wasn’t much that disagreed on during the wedding planning except for food. Me and my family are vegans, and there so many reasons why we chose this lifestyle and one of them being that we have a history of health issues.
My fiance and his family are the complete opposite. they’re hardcore meat eaters which is fine by me obviously.
However, When deciding on the wedding food menu, I wanted to add 4-5 vegan options.
This was not ok with her fiance and his family, though, who thought “salads and appetizers” should be plenty and that 4-5 vegan options would be a “waste of money.”
My fiance and his mom objected saying it was a waste of money over food that ‘isn’t real food’. They also argued that this would be offensive for ‘their’ guests and suggested my vegan options just be “the good ol’ salads & appetizers” (his mom wanted cupcakes lol).
I said no because for one it’s me and my family who’s paying. and two I want to make my guests feel welcome and not be treated as second class citizens by being served “salad”. my fiance made a face and said “isn’t that what vegans eat?”.
I refused to argue about it and said it was final.
OP held firm, as it was her family paying the bill and she wanted them to have nice food at her wedding.
She thought it was settled, but then found out her fiance had gone behind her back and canceled all of the vegan options.
The other day, I found out that he had cancelled all the vegan options and took them off the menu completely and behind my back. I was seething. I called him at work but he kept hanging up on me. I went straight to his workplace and confronted him there and just flipped out on him.
He was stunned to see me. He at first said it was his mom’s idea then told me to go home because I was making a scene at the office.
OP lost it on him, even showing up to his work to have it out after he refused to take her calls.
Both he and his mother have held firm on his decision and believe OP is the one being nonsensical about the whole thing, but OP doesn’t think so.
the fight continued at home and he defended himself by saying that I sort of made him resort to doing this after I kept brushing off his thoughs and input, and refusing to accommadate his family. but there were PLENTY of meat options why why can’t I get 4-5 vegan options?
when I’m paying for it?. He yelled that it was his wedding too not my family’s. My family said it was fine and they’ll figure it out and told me to let it go but I refused.
AITA for putting my foot down on this?
Reddit is about to straighten her out!
The top comment says OP should run for the hills.
Everyone sees the giant red flags.
This person thinks it’s weird someone would not want to make all of their guests feel included.
And this commenter says it’s about a lot more than a menu.
This person thinks their family is acting totally irrational.
This is bizarre and concerning.
OP should definitely get out while the getting is still free and easy.