Jessica Miller is the host of a podcast called Mind Your Boundaries and she likes to take questions from her audience to shed light on relationship issues.
Jessica recently posted a TikTok video to answer a question from a listener who wanted to hear an example of when good intentions cross boundaries.
She told viewers a story about a mother-in-law who surprised her son and daughter-in-law by decorating the nursery for their upcoming baby while they were out of town.
But there was a big problem…they weren’t happy about what she decided to do.
The mother-in-law said that she thought she was doing the right thing and that she should this would cheer up her son who was dealing with a lot of stress.
Jessica said that she thinks the mother-in-law should apologize and offered up an example that she might want to use. She said, “I would go to them and I would say, ‘You guys, I am profoundly sorry. I truly thought I was doing a good thing for you and now I see that I missed one crucial part. That I took away the experience of putting together your baby’s nursery and I’m sorry.'”
Take a look at her video.
@mind_yourboundaries 📣 Boundary question submitted for me to share. Sometimes, our good intentions cross boundaries. This mom thought she was doing such a great thing for her son and daughter-in-law that she overlooked potential boundary violations. Once you acknowledge their feelings, they ‘should’ be open to having a conversation because they’ll feel understood and seen by you. It was a sweet gesture, and the part overlooked is putting together the nursery as a memory-making experience for parents-to-be. I hope this helps, and congratulations on the new arrival coming soon! ❤️ #boundaries #boundariesbelike #mindyourboundaries #wwyd #wwydinthissituation #boundaries101 #howtosetboundaries #boundarysettingtips #familystress #boundarieswithinlaws #familydrama #inlawproblems #boundarieswithfamily #boundarieswithparents #boundaryscript #boundaryscripts
And here’s how people responded.
This viewer said the MIL had good intentions.
Another TikTokker said they would not have been cool with this.
And one viewer said she should have just given them money so they could do it themselves.
I guess she was only trying to help.
But still…maybe not the best idea.