Family dynamics are specific to every situation, and there are certainly families where more is expected of older children. Whether it’s help with chores, bills, or child care, parents sometimes find themselves in situations where they need help.
Forcing kids to do more than you’re doing, though, is pretty icky.
OP is a teenager and describes himself as a “good” kid.
I’ll give background to who I am, I’m 16(m) with 2 parents 1(38F) 1(40M), 3 younger sisters 1 (14), 1 (2), and 1 due in march.
I’m in high school (Jr year) doing well, passing my classes with mostly A’s, making honor roll every year, and a “good” kid in high school.
I wouldn’t consider myself a lazy person either, as I workout 3-5 times a week, wrestle during the winter, and clean the house 2-5 times a week.
I don’t normally socialize often outside of school as I don’t feel motivated to do so, so then I just stay inside and either play my game, read, study a language, or pray.
Despite this, his mother refuses to help him with things that might keep him away from home.
Somewhere in June or July (2023) my mom was pregnant but then had a miscarriage 5 weeks later, 2 weeks later she gets pregnant again with a girl.
I wanted to work over the summer and be a little bit more independent as I’m only a few years from being a legal adult so I ask my mom can I work. She says yes but she needs to get money for an ID.
The next thing you know she never gives me my ID to work.
She also berates him him not doing enough to help with his siblings.
My mom complains that I go out a lot and give my attention to my girlfriend instead of my baby sister or the “things” around the house saying I half a** things around here.
Many times I don’t have a problem with playing/watching my sister but at times my mom makes it seem like I’m obligated to watch my sister anytime she’s tired from work or sees she’s “struggling”.
And that she once again says she pays for everything and all I do is ask for items just because I clean the house “like I’m supposed to do”. Which I feel isn’t true as I hardly ask for wants.
One comment she said was I can walk to school. Mind you it’s the winter and when I wanted to walk to school. She said it was not safe to do so.
And she won’t be paying my phone bill anymore as it’s her money and have my girlfriend pay for it instead.
He’s feeling badly for calling her out about having more kids when she’s already drowning, but should he?
Moving forward a year or so when my mom announced she was pregnant, I was kinda of irritated because she would always complain about bills and how she needed to catch up on them.
I proceeded to say how are you going to say you need to catch up on bills but then have another child.
I can’t remember what she had told me, but a month or two later the reason she wanted to have another kid was because “I love being a mother.”
In my head at the time I kinda seen it as selfish as she didn’t want to be “alone”.
I also made the comment when I wanted to work you said no because I’m not “ready” then started yelling at me telling me to go to my room while slamming the doors.
Reddit’s ready to render their verdict!
The top comment says the bottom line is that OP is not responsible for all of those things.
And this person thinks he should stay out of the house as much as he can.
This commenter has some great practical advice.
There was, of course, a simple answer.
And they don’t think her reasoning makes a whole lot of sense.
I feel sorry for this kid.
This is the time in his life where he should be allowed to think more about himself.
If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.