Families are complicated – some, of course, more than others.
I have no doubt that navigating the ins and outs of these tough situations is hard on everyone’s hearts and souls.
OP has parents she loves and a brother who takes advantage of them.
All adults involved are in their 30’s, except my parents who are in their 60’s.
My daughter is 3.
My brother is a very complicated man, but ultimately has spent many years now using drugs/alcohol and taking advantage of my parents to do so.
He has stolen from them, gaslit them, and controlled them. He lived with them until very recently after losing his job to a DUI.
My parents grew up in very difficult circumstances, so have vowed to never let any of their children go without, which of course I have benefited from too and am very grateful for (as is our older brother), but we’ve never taken advantage like our other brother.
He has had therapy and support (paid for by me and my parents) but still acts the way he does.
After some poor decisions and bad behavior, she stated she no longer wants her brother around her child unless she or her husband are present.
After years of also being lied to, being shouted at and called awful things, and a particularly bad incident when he was drunk in charge of my child and committed some other crimes, I told him I wasn’t interested in a relationship with him until he was better.
My parents were supportive of this, and me and my partner were clear we did not want my brother around our child without us present.
We told my brother this as well.
Her parents agreed, but continue to let him around the little girl.
My parents look after our daughter (3) once a week.
Today, for the third time, I found my brother there.
I’ve been told he was there to collect something, but he was sat with a drink while my daughter played.
My daughter has also said he was at the park with them.
OP is considering finding alternative childcare but worries what it would do for her relationship with her parents.
I’m furious and considering getting alternative childcare as I don’t know if I can trust my parents any more.
My husband supports this and, if we really budget, we could possibly afford it.
But this would cause major drama in my family and I don’t know if my relationship with my parents would recover.
AITA for expecting my parents not to let my brother in if my child is there?
My cousin says I can’t control who my parents let in their own house, and I agree, but I also think my worries about my child should be respected.
The top comment says she definitely can’t trust her parents.
This person says her parents need to realize what a big mistake they have made.
The grandparents are going to have a tough decision ahead of them, too.
Their child’s safety have to come before keeping the peace.
Her parents should feel the same way.
I don’t envy this poor woman at all – but she has to choose her kiddo.
If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.