Like every experience in life, being married is a little bit (or a lot) different for everyone.
I was honestly surprised by the number of people in the comments who claim they wouldn’t let a spouse know whether or not they were going to be eating dinner at home.
OP’s husband keeps close to the same schedule every day.
AITA when I (34F) get mad when my husband (35M) does things without telling me. He owns his own office and the office closes at 5pm.
The house is about a 20 minute drive away but he usually gets home between 5-6pm because he gets out late sometimes.
Part of that is the two of them having dinner together.
This last situation, he went out to eat dinner with his brother and a business representative to discuss business things.
The reason I got mad was he got home at 6pm and never told me anything about his plans. We usually eat after we put the kids to bed.
So, she was caught off guard when he told her he’d already eaten.
About an hour later, we are getting our young kids to bed and after I ask if he’s planning on cooking potatoes for dinner, he says no but he could make me some because he ate already.
I ask if he’s joking that he ate already and he tells me he went out to dinner. I yelled at him for not telling me.
He said that he didn’t need to tell me because he was still home around the same time he always gets home and that I am absurd for wanting him to tell me where he’s at.
Now she’s wondering whether or not she’s overreacting.
Not only am I mad because he didn’t tell me but the fact that he doesn’t think he has to tell me.
Also mad because he says that he doesn’t do these things very often and that once in a while is okay because he doesn’t do it everyday.
AITA?
Like I said, Reddit has some interesting responses.
The top commenter isn’t exactly sure what to make of this.
This person, though, doesn’t think OP’s expectations are odd at all.
A lot of people do think it’s rude not to give a head’s up about dinner out.
And this commenter agrees OP’s feelings are valid.
Plenty, like this person, think OP is being overbearing for some reason.
I don’t think she’s wrong in this specific instance.
But it sounds like there might be more to unpack.
If you liked that story, check out this one about a Costco customer who got their cart stolen… so she hatched a plan to get it back!