Times sure seem to be changing when it comes to people having kids these days.
And when I say that, I mean that less and less American adults are choosing to have kiddos…and I’m one of them…
But there are negatives to not having kids, and today we’re gonna get a dose of reality from AskReddit users.
Check out what they said about this.
Kinda morbid.
“I will probably be found at the bottom of the stairs.
This is after one of my 6 cats tripped me while going down them and falling an breaking a hip and laying in my own waste for days before I finally succumb of dehydration and starvation.
But the cats will be fed.”
Goes by fast.
“I’ve noticed that I have a very different sense of time passing since I’m not attached to the school calendar.
I tend to not notice it passing as much.
And then abruptly, it seems to catch up to me.”
True.
“If you like kids and want to volunteer with them I’ve found not having one already gets more than a few raises eyebrows and “well why are you interested?”
I’m not a kid snatcher, I just really enjoy it when I can give the kids back afterwards.”
It happens…
“In general you lose all your friends who have kids.
Parents socialize when the kids play etc, and you aren’t invited so you miss out.
Eventually you stop getting invited to most things because you’re just not around enough to be planned in.”
Missing out.
“You don’t get to experience the joy of a second childhood.
I’m childless by choice but I love seeing my nieces’ excitement over holidays and vacations. My brother loves playing santa for the kid and seeing the joy of Christmas morning.
My grandpa always joked that hanging out with me was like having a third childhood because we’d always do fun things like visit dinosaur museums or make snowmen together.”
The downsides.
“I don’t have children and don’t want them.
But there are definitely downsides to it, though to be fair there are also downsides to having children too. Mainly, that having kids can be extremely fulfilling and a rewarding experience.
Seeing a human being that is part you, part someone you love deeply (at least in theory) grow and develop. It can be profoundly rewarding to see them learn new things, engage in the world, and blossom into a full fledged adult.
It’s also fun to show them your favorite things and see how they react- like movies and video games.”
Reality.
“Being alone on the holidays might be an issue.
Another is help with things as your body and mind deteriorates, I work in a clinic, patients that can’t drive will often have their adult children bring them in.
Childless elders will probably need to rely more on social services and may need to live in a nursing home sooner, some of these services may not exist or be unaffordable by that time.
I’m not saying these are reasons TO HAVE kids, they’re not, no one should I have kids because they’re scared of being alone, but they are realities.”
It’s different…
“It’s a different kind of love.
Having someone you’d *** for without a second thought seems bad from the outside, because it’s so other-focused.
But it’s a fierce love that you can’t experience any other way. And most people don’t actually have to jump in front of a bus, so the risk is low.
So you miss that. It’s amazing. I’m sure there are amazing things I’ve missed by having kids, and have no reference for. But since you asked about the con, missing that is a big one.”
Uh oh.
“I’ve got no kids, no SO, nobody I can really lean on, and I’ve come to the VERY sobering realization that if/when something like that happens to me in old age, I am screwed.”
All of it.
“People constantly ask why you don’t have them.
You don’t get those nice tax bonuses for having them.
You are expected to schedule your life around other people’s children (coworkers taking off for spring break, etc).
People assume you have no need for raises, vacations, etc because you don’t have children to provide for.
You and your partner/roommates will never be considered a family because you don’t have children.
And most importantly: you can’t go to the playground and use the swings. People assume you’re creepy.”
There’s that…
“Most of my childfree friends complain about how other people tend to assume their life is less than.
Work volunteers you to work late cause no one is at home needing you.
Others expect you to be free for errands or inconvenient things.
People don’t understand why you can’t just drop everything cause nothing in a childfree personal life could possibly be as important as children.”
Less energy.
“Loneliness, less full family life, missing that unconditional love, excitement.
Kids get really excited about stuff, it rubs off on you, and you feel how it makes you feel more energized.”
To each their own, right?
If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.