Most people want to give their friends the benefit of the doubt, and we help them out when they need a hand.
It can be hard, though, when you feel like they’re taking advantage.
This man let a friend who was having a rough financial time crash.
I (21 when this happened) lived in a studio apartment (kitchen is separate but small).
I have a buddy who is doing grad school part time and he has been struggling financially, so, because he only has classes for 2 days per week, and they’re back to back, I let him stay with me.
It was nice having someone around, no big deal.
He sleeps in my room, on an inflatable mattress, and that was fine for a semester and a half.
I don’t charge him anything but he buys me breakfast or coffee and it’s totally fine by me.
It’s nice to have company and we get along well.
Then, he introduced his friend to a girl.
Then, this girl comes into the equation. He actually met her through me. I’m in the same department as her and I brought him along to a social event and they hit it off.
This is not anything new because he pulled the same moves on another girl I know and it didn’t work out.
Anyway, they were going on a few dates here and there but it was nothing serious.
Then, a few weeks later, I suggested a little gathering at my place with some close friends, including him, but not her.
I only have a small place and she’s not a close friend, but, at the last minute, he asked if he could invite her.
I was a bit reluctant but I knew he was into her so I said sure.
The next time they had people over, he asked if the girl could stay, too.
I knew she was in town soon to move into a new apartment so I figured it was because of that.
Turns out, no, she was not in town, but travelled like 1h30 to attend (which I did not find out until later).
Anyway, it was all fine although they kind of ignored everyone and just sat in the corner giggling to each other which was awkward.
When it was time for everyone to leave, he asked if she could stay in the room with us.
He said that he figured that she could just stay with us because he was staying here and he liked her.
He said no, and things have been frosty between them.
I was fuming because, first of all, I have one room, and they’re already all over each other and I do not want to be around that.
But, it felt so calculated and sneaky, like he clearly knew that he was going to ask me this the whole time but didn’t.
He then tried to make me feel bad for her by saying she didn’t have all of her stuff moved into her apartment. I said that was unfortunately her problem.
They then left to go to her apartment which didn’t have much bedding but was fine. I have been cordial but things have naturally ve frosty since.
I feel like he took advantage of my kindness. But, at the same time, I know he likes her, so I feel a bit bad.
They are official now so clearly things worked out, but AITA?
Does Reddit think he did anything wrong?
This person says he needs to stand up for himself.
He should have cleared it ahead of time.
And she had somewhere else to sleep.
They tried to manipulate him.
I don’t think he did anything wrong.
But I doubt his friend is going to see it that way.
If you liked that post, check out this one about an employee that got revenge on HR when they refused to reimburse his travel.