I’m sure for most people, we would send money to family members who really need it.
But what would you do if they weren’t even grateful for it? Or even seemed to take advantage of your generosity?
That’s exactly what’s happening for this woman and her husband.
Let’s see how she handles her mother in law…
AITA for telling my MIL that it is inappropriate to keep asking her son for money
I will try to keep it short. MIL has asked for money since the 1st day I met her.
She was a SAH Mom for most of her life, and had 4 sons with 2 different men. Both ex-husbands have passed away, so now she reaches out to her sons for money.
Boyfriend (31M) and I (29F) live together and have been together for two years.
Let’s get the details…
In that time, he has paid her cell phone bill regularly, given her 500€, sent her random amounts between 50-100€, bought her things for her home (toaster, new comforter, etc.) and even brought her food.
Many times she doesn’t even say thank you, maybe twice?
BF and I are comfortable, but not rich. I am a free-lance tutor and he is a security guard.
We are tight, but make do. For a year, MIL has been pushing him to agree to give her 50€ monthly.
She thinks if each son gives her 50€, then she can have 200€ a month. I don’t understand the need for this extra money.
The gov helps pay for her apartment, and she gets SS and pension.
All of her sons chip in to help…
Between her 4 sons, they pay for her home goods, another son pays for her hair and nail appointments (way more frequently than I even allow myself to go to the salon, and I don’t even get my nails done), another takes her out to eat.
No matter what she receives, she insists on more each time.
Yesterday was BF’s bday, and today is MIL’s bday. Because they are so close in days, and we both work today, we brought her a birthday cake last night to celebrate both birthdays together.
She had nothing prepared for BF, not even a card, but was happy to accept the cake.
Things were actually okay until we finished eating and she brought up money again.
This is where things get messy…
She said she complained to her friend how she has four sons and only one of them helps her (so untrue, as I have a record at this point of everything everyone, myself included, has bought her).
She said her friend would be calling the sons because “50€ to you guys is nothing, but to me it is a lot.”
I calmly asked, “MIL, when you decided to have 4 children, what was your plan for when you got to this age?”
She said, “Oh, I didn’t have one.”
I said, “Oh, okay. And why do you think 50€ is nothing to your son? How can anyone say 50€ is nothing to anyone with the cost of living these days.”
She said, “Yes, but would you let your mother go hungry?”
I said, “No, I wouldn’t, but your sons haven’t let you go hungry.”
Time for the mic drop…
I added, “I am actually really surprised that on your son’s birthday, when he brought YOU a cake on HIS birthday, came to YOUR house, and you didn’t get him ANYTHING, not even a card, you are comfortable sitting her making him feel bad for not giving you money.”
He didn’t stop me so I kept going, “At 31 years old, do you think your son and I don’t want to start our own family? But we know we can’t do that economically, and we don’t want to burden our kids with that in the future.”
She lost it. I am banned from the family now. BF is 100% on my side. AITA?
Let’s see what the comments said.
This Reddit user thinks this is for the best.
Another commenter can relate.
Several commenters made a good point about her boyfriend.
This user saw things a little different.
While I’d do anything for my mom, I don’t know if I could handle what this couple is going through.
Hopefully this MIL decides to be a little more grateful!
If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.