Boundaries in relationships are a tricky thing because they can also involve other people and it’s not necessarily okay to decide what others can and can’t do.
I’m on the fence about this post about a woman who accepted a gift from his son’s wealthy girlfriend and now he’s mad about it.
Especially because I love expensive things. Just kidding (I do, but that’s not why I’m on the fence).
Read it and you’ll see what I mean.
AITA for accepting and refusing to return a gift from my son’s girlfrend?
My (M23) son is five months into dating his girlfriend (f22).
She’s a complete delight to be around and I think we’ve bonded quite a bit despite the short time we’ve known each other.
Now I have to mention here that she’s very rich. My son estimates that the money she gets from her parents every month is the same as his yearly income.
And now the anxiety begins…
My son has expressed to me several times that he’s worried it might look like he’s only dating her for her money.
He’s been really strict about things like paying his share of things and not accepting expensive gifts from her.
Yesterday was my birthday and his girlfriend got me a very expensive designer handbag that I’d mentioned being excited by months ago even though I could never afford it on my own.
Understandably, this went over well with mom, but not the son…
I’m so touched that she remembered a short comment I made so long ago.
I told my son about it and he became so angry at me, said he’s had to refuse so many gifts, outings and vacation plans since they’ve been dating because he can’t stand her thinking he’s into her money, and here I am, happily accepting the first gift she’s got me.
He demanded that I return it immediately or I’ll disturb the dynamic of their relationship.
Oh hell naw…
I refused and told him it’s such a thoughtful gift even not considering the price and she’ll be hurt if I return it.
Now he’s saying I’m greedy and don’t care that I’m making him out to look like a gold digger whose family is happy to mooch off her.
Let’s have a look at the comments.
This was a very common opinion and I couldn’t have said it better myself.
Seems I’m not the only one who doesn’t understand this.
Good point, but I don’t see it heading in that direction.
SO sweet! I would be very touched if someone remembered this and did it for me.
This. You don’t get to dictate other people’s lives just because you’re insecure.
The expression “stay in your own lane” comes to mind.
Be gracious and happy for your mom!
If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.