Dealing with an ex can be uncomfortable and dramatic, especially if the couple did not end in good terms. Sometimes, moving on without a closure is the best way to end things.

Here’s a story of a guy who found out that he only had a few years to live. When his ex-girlfriend found out about it, she wanted to talk to him, apologize for what she did in the past, and get closure.

He didn’t agree.

Read the full story below and see if he was a jerk for not granting his ex’s request.

AITA for telling my ex she’ll have to live without her closure?

I’m going to cut to the chase. I (36M) got about a year or so left before making that final trip to the after life. I’ve made my peace with it, and these last few years have been the best of my life.

We’ve known for a while that I was living on borrowed time, so we vacationed a lot before covid.

Everyone knows I probably won’t be here by next year.

The past returns.

Well, as it turns out, my old ex decided to come back into my life.

We were together since highschool.

Before I proposed, I found out she was cheating with one of her friends, and broke up with me when we were 27. It was the darkest time of my life, until I was pushed into going to therapy.

But OP is happy with his present.

3 years later, I got back into dating and met my wife.

We got married after 2 years, and we have been together ever since. She’s been the most incredible partner through all this, and I don’t know how I would’ve made it without her.

He thinks it’s a bad idea.

You can guess why my ex came back. She’d like us to meet so she could formally apologize to me and have one last conversation.

I said no way.

She is the last person I want to see right now, and didn’t take it well, I guess.

Now, the ex’s parents are involved.

Our families are somewhat close. Her parents have been my aunt’s neighbors before either of us were even born, so they still saw eachother after we split.

My aunt heard from her folks that I’m refusing to see her, and she’s gotten my parents involved.

All he wants is to just live peacefully before he goes… without the drama from the past!

Now, they all hate her (except my aunt who always had a soft spot for her), but they do feel like maybe we should talk before I go.

I don’t know what exactly they think this will bring, aside from just dragging up painful memories.

I don’t want to bring up anything from the past, and just focus on making the most with my wife and family. They left it alone at first, until my ex tried reach me again asking to please meet.

Family members are taking sides now, and he is being called out for not giving her closure.

My ex says she’s heartbroken over my condition and just wants us to talk, so we can have closure. But I explained to her I had mine years ago, and I am in a better place.

And where I believe I was the jerk, telling her she’s gonna have to live without hers.

I’m getting a little more ridiculed from my aunt and my dad. Mom’s still a bit on my side about it.

He and his wife are standing their grounds.

They do think what I said was very insensitive, and it’s clearly painful for her knowing what she did to me, and that I’ll be gone soon.

My wife is completely on my side here, and actually gave my dad a piece of her mind (it was pretty hot to see; she rarely ever yells) for making things more complicated for me.

While he’s firm about his decision, it still bothers him for not agreeing to talk with his ex.

They’ve left me alone, but it’s still on my mind, and I don’t know how exactly I was a jerk for saying that.

I had said it as a statement, there’s no reason for us to speak except it being for her benefit, and since I’d rather not, then she will, in fact, have to live without that closure.

AITA?

Let’s take a look at what people have to say about this.

Yup, she could have apologized years ago. Why doing it only now?

This commenter doesn’t care about the ex, only sending OP well wishes on his final days.

Another commendation and well wishes for OP.

Very well said!

This user says OP deserves to be at peace and happy.

He had moved on. She should, too.

Sometimes, not getting the closure you want is the closure you need.

If you liked that story, check out this one about a woman who went on a date with somebody who was 10 years older than her. Find out what happened!