The funny thing about life is that it rarely ends up where you thought it would when you were a kid.

Or at least, you could never in a million years have predicted the twists and turns and sideroads that would take you where you eventually ended up.

This woman always wanted to be a mom but never could, but she was lucky to get a stepdaughter and then a granddaughter out of the deal.

Now, her stepdaughter is accusing her of intentionally stepping into more of a motherhood role than she meant for her to have, and things are getting awkward.

Check it out!

AITA? My stepdaughter’s daughter mentioned me in her graduation speech and not my stepdaughter

I’m 62F. My stepdaughter (“K”) has been in my life since she was 8. I met my late husband when I was 34 and he was 37, K is his daughter from his previous marriage.

We got married when K was 11. She was close to her mother so she never considered me a mother, but we had a good relationship.

Unfortunately my husband and I weren’t able to have children.

When her stepdaughter got pregnant after high school, she was able to accept the situation better than the girl’s mother.

Just after K finished high school she got pregnant, she’d only been dating her boyfriend for a few weeks and he didn’t want to stay with her.

K really wanted to keep the baby though, but she was planning to go out of state for college, so we had a long talk about it.

Her mother didn’t want to be involved as she was very disapproving of the whole thing. She was (justifiably I suppose) angry at K for making stupid choices that could alter her future and K sort of pulled away from her after that.

In fact, she ended up raising her granddaughter for the first 7 years of her life while her mother finished school.

So I quit my job to raise her baby (“H”).

K decided to switch to a college closer to home so she could visit H every weekend. She called almost everyday to see her. She was trying very hard to balance staying connected to her child and also setting up a decent future, but obviously H was much closer to me.

I was with her every day until she was four and she only saw her mom once a week and on video call.

I tried telling her that K was her mom and I was grandma, and she didn’t call me mom, but she was closer to me.

They both remained close to her over the years, though she was arguably closer to her grandmother.

After college K did a postgrad degree for 3 more years. Then she moved back to our city.

She tried really hard to build a close relationship with H but by that time she was 7 and even though they did become close, she would always sort of come to me first for things.

K was sad about this but we didn’t really talk about it.

Eventually K got married and H lives with them, but she visits me multiple times a week and we text every day.

K’s dad also passed which was really hard for both of us.

Things came to a head when her granddaughter thanked her in her graduation speech.

So H just graduated from high school and she was selected to give a speech because she was a standout student. 🙂

She called me and asked if it was okay if she mentions me. I said that’s really sweet of her and of course.

K and her husband and I went to it together. In the speech H talked about how her best childhood memories are the stories I told her, and it was really sweet.

She only mentioned K in the bit at the end where you thank everyone who helped you get here and whatnot.

Now her stepdaughter is accusing her of “stealing” the mom spot in her daughter’s life because she couldn’t have kids of her own.

K didn’t say anything during the party but afterward she told me she felt like I always “encouraged” H to stay closer to me than her, like I was “competing” with her.

She said that I wanted to be a parent so badly that I took it from her.

I just want some unbiased opinions.

Is it possible?

Reddit never pulls punches!

The top comment says her stepdaughter is likely struggling with her own guilt.

Actions have consequences. Weird.

This is her stepdaughter’s issue, not hers.

You can do everything right and people can still get hurt.

Seven years is a long time.

I think being happy about something isn’t the same as engineering it.

That said, I would be hurt if I was the mom, too.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.