Their Parents Lied About Their Oldest Child For Years, Then Are Surprised That Their Other Children Don’t Handle Learning About Her All That Well

Trisha Leigh

4 months ago

Source: Shutterstock/Reddit

It can be a surprising moment when you really realize for the first time that your parents are just human beings like everyone else.

They make mistakes, and have to figure out how to handle them with the tools they have at the time.

No one is blaming these people for giving their first child up for adoption because they weren’t ready to be parents.

They might be blaming them for the poor handling of the news with their younger children, though.

Check out the details!

AITA for blaming my parents for the way my sister reacted to their other daughter finding us?

My parents were always open with me (26m) and my siblings (27m, 23m and 22f) about the fact they had another kid before us and gave them up for adoption.

But our parents always said they had a son had given up and that we had a brother given up for adoption. That was something they were very clear on.

Not only did they say that but they built my sister up as their only little girl a lot. They’d make it a thing for her to be proud of, she was adored by the family, she was their special little girl, their one and only.

She was our only sister and we’d all be a little extra protective of her as her older brothers.

His sister was very upset about the lies she’d been told.

Five months ago we found out they lied when their daughter tracked us down and said she wanted to get to know us/be a part of the family.

My parents were so excited. They were hardly able to contain themselves.

My sister freaked out and has refused to meet her. She brought up our parents lies and said she was never really as special as they claimed and told them she would never accept a sister and would never accept being made less special.

Our parents acted so confused about her reaction. They tried reassuring her and they encouraged her to meet their daughter… it was a mess.

The oldest, adopted sister is hurt over the whole thing.

My brothers and I have met this new sister. I met her once and I believe it’s the same for my brothers.

I felt no instant connection to her and it was just all kinds of awkward.

She was really disappointed she didn’t get to meet all of us and she came on very strong when we met her which made the awkwardness more awkward.

I think she was expecting us to be way more excited than we were and a lot more into the idea of being a family with her.

The fact my sister refused to even meet her was something she mentioned 10 different times when she met us.

Apparently she still brings it up, which made my parents bring it up several times to me and to my brothers I’m guessing.

His parents are acting like they didn’t do anything wrong.

The other day they were saying how upset they were that my sister refused to come to moms birthday party because they had invited our other sister.

They were saying how they thought she’d handle it better and be excited.

I told them it was their fault for lying our whole lives (which they admitted they did, our other sister isn’t a trans woman, my parents knew she was a girl) and then hyping my sister up to be their only daughter.

I told them the way they did it probably made her feel like she lost their love when it was no longer the truth in her world.

He says they definitely did, and need to see what.

My parents told me I shouldn’t blame them.

They also accused me of putting my sister before them and their daughter and how clear it is whose side I’m on based on the lack of warmth to their daughter.

They also said it was unfair to blame them for the actions of an adult.

AITA?

What does Reddit think?

Let’s find out!

The top comment says the parents definitely created this situation.