I know I’m probably preaching to the choir, but a lot of folks out there are 100% CRAZY.
You know it, I know, we all know it!
The guy who wrote this story was just trying to mind his own business when he got a phone call out of nowhere that turned things upside down.
Take a look at what went down!
By All Means, Please Tell My Wife About Us.
“In a previous life—before my world came apart about five months ago—I was the solo pastor of a medium-sized church in a large(ish) Southern city.
One unhappy side effect of being a solo pastor is that when your phone rings, you answer it even if you don’t recognize the number since you have no idea how important the call may be.
He was always in demand.
It could be a church member’s grandkid (whom you’ve never met) calling to tell you Miss Bessie has been diagnosed with some horrible disease. Or it could be a church member who just wants to talk your ear off for two hours.
So earlier this evening my phone rings.
Me: “Hello?”
Her: “Heeeeeey, what are you up to?”I want to be clear before I proceed that I don’t recognize this lady’s voice but I just assumed that she was a former church member, member’s kid or grandkid…something. So I was cordial.
Just go along with it…
Me: “Not much, honestly. I actually just walked through the door with some food. How about you?”
Her: “I’m hanging out with {girl whose name I don’t know}.”
Me: “Great. I’m sorry to have to ask this, but with whom am I speaking? I don’t recognize your voice and I have no idea who {other girl} is.”Ladies and gentlemen, apparently that was the wrong thing to say.
Huh?
Her: “Darren, you know who this is! This is Jessie!”
Me: “Well, Miss Jessie, I **** to break this to you but my name isn’t Darren and I don’t know any women named Jessie. I believe you’ve called the wrong number.”
Her: “No I didn’t! This isn’t funny Darren. What happened? Did you leave your ringer on again and you’re worried your wife is going hear us talking?”
Me: “Ma’am, I’m very sorry but now I know you’ve got the wrong number.”
Her: “I want to come over there and tell her all about us and how you’ve been screwing me behind her back for two years. I’m sick of this ****.”Cue malicious compliance.
He was OVER IT.
Me: “…you know what, that would be great. By all means, come to my house and wake my wife up and tell her all about our torrid affair.”
Her: “I’m leaving now.” engine cranks in background.
Me: “Okay. See you soon!”Five months ago I discovered that my wife of ten years started cheating on me eighteen months into our marriage. She racked up a grand total of 16 affairs in a decade.
Somewhere in my immediate area a man’s wife was just awakened by her husband’s sidepiece banging on the front door.
She deserves to know what kind of man she married. I’m just sorry I can’t be a fly on the wall for the very special episode of the Jerry Springer Show that just started in her driveway.”
Let’s see what folks had to say on Reddit.
This reader shared their thoughts.
Another person spoke up.
This person asked a good question…
This Reddit user had a lot to say.
And this reader shared their thoughts.
Someone was in for a rude awakening…
If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.