A wedding is supposed to be one of the most special, if not stressful, days of your entire life!
In just the day alone you have to worry about the ceremony, the reception, the guests, transport, etc. So why would you think that your wedding day is the perfect time to get a tattoo?
Well apparently that’s exactly what this user’s cousin wanted her to do for him, even though he only gave her a week’s notice about his request!
Was she being “selfish” to turn him down? Decide for yourself!
AITA for refusing to tattoo at my cousins wedding?
So a little to my background: I am a tattoo artist. I’ve done an apprenticeship the first year of tattooing. I work as a tattoo artist for 4 years now and I opened a studio recently.
Me and my family are invited to a wedding, that is taking place in another state. My Cousin is marrying and we got the invitation a few months ago.
Time has moved forward and now the wedding is in a week already. Out of the blue my cousin, Matt, texted me with something like: “You’re gonna tattoo me on my wedding day“.
But this wedding day tattoo session was certainly news to OP!
I was a bit confused as I never even thought of bringing my equipment, since I also didn’t plan a guest spot or anything.
Guestspot is a tattoo artist working at another studio for a few days or weeks, mostly in a different area to grow the clientele.
I jokingly asked if he has a machine, as i still hoped that he wasn’t serious. He then said “Don’t you have one?” (???) and that one machine wouldn’t take up that much space to take with.
When OP politely declined, he told her that he had been counting on the fact that she would be tattooing, despite not ever telling her!
I replied that I didn’t plan on bringing my equipment, and that I need more than just a machine (color, hygiene stuff, stencil(thats the purple stuff you put on the skin to trace), etc.)
I said I’m not prepared to tattoo at a wedding of which i don’t know anything about (layout of the location, is it inside/outside and so on).
He then said that he had planned on this and that it would mean a lot to him to both get a tattoo on his wedding day and that I’d be the one to tattoo him.
Remember that this is the first time I’m hearing this.
OP stood her ground and said she just wasn’t prepared to do something like this…
I again said that I don’t feel comfortable with that, and that it’s quite short notice as I work until we fly over to attend the wedding. Besides, a tattoo needs to be designed first, right?
He saw my message but didn’t reply. This morning my mother called and she was furious… she asked why I couldn’t get it together and just tattoo Matt.
I told her what I’ve previously told Matt but she didn’t wanna hear it. She said it would mean a lot to her and Matt‘s family and that it could be my wedding gift then she hung up.
I talked to my brother about it and he just shrugged it off and said „it would be nice of you though.“
After talking to her family, OP was reconsidering her stance…
I’m unsure what to do now, as I said I’m not really comfortable with the whole situation.
Especially because I’ve never been guestspotting, so I never had to travel -let alone get on a plane- with my equipment.
But is that just selfish? I mean it would mean a lot to apparently everyone and I’m just saying no?
If it meant SO much to OP’s cousin that he get tattooed at his wedding, isn’t that something he would want to bring up with her as they were planning it, or at least when they invited OP?
Reddit said regardless of his poor planning, the idea of getting a tattoo on your wedding day is already ridiculous…
Others suspected that OP might not have been Matt’s first choice.
This user said that if Matt wanted OP at his wedding, he would have to pay!
Finally, many people pointed out how tacky it was to “give yourself” a wedding gift from one of your guests!
You need more than a week’s notice to plan a tattoo!
If you liked that story, check out this post about an oblivious CEO who tells a web developer to “act his wage”… and it results in 30% of the workforce being laid off.