Weddings come with a lot of built-in drama. Who is responsible for what, how far you’re making family members travel, how dressy you want people to get, etc.

But nothing is more dramatic than selecting who is in the bridal party of the wedding. Friendships can be ended, feelings can be hurt, and people can even get uninvited!

But when this user’s father demanded his mistress’ daughter be his own daughter’s flower girl, she refused, saying they were going with her fiancé’s niece?

Was she wrong to make this decision even after her father had helped pay for the wedding? Decide for yourself!

AITA for wanting my fiancé’s niece to be the flower girl than my father’s mistress’ daughter?

I(28F) and my fiancé (27M) are planning on getting married in October. We have the dream location that we have always wanted and have most of the planning completed.

My father had an affair with his now wife. She has two kids from a previous relationship(6F,8M).

My mother did remarry to my step-father, who I have a very close relationship with.

So much so, in fact, that OP elected to have her step-father walk her down the aisle over her father….

My father offered to pay a significant amount of money for the wedding and wanted to walk me down the aisle.

I told him that I only wanted my step-father to walk me down.

He was heartbroken, but understood why I made my choice.

But this issue paled in comparison to the debacle over who would be the flower girl!

The bigger issue came up when my fiancé and I decided to ask my his brother if his daughter(5F) could be the flower girl and she was very excited.

I have no contact with my father’s wife, so it took me by surprise when I received a long text message from her sent.

She wanted to know if her daughter could be the flower girl as my father put a ton of money into the wedding.

Having already found a flower girl, OP politely declined…

I told her that we had already asked my fiancé’s niece to be flower girl.

His wife started sending me hateful text messages on how I am being ungrateful and this is the least I could do for my father.

I told her that I would happily return the money that he gave me for the wedding. She sent me a few more messages calling me a jerk and I had enough and blocked her.

OP held firm in her decision, despite pressure from her Father’s family…

My father did reach out and thinks that I should compromise to keep the peace and let the daughter walk with fiancé’s niece.

I told him that I was over all this stress and if this continued, then they would be uninvited to the wedding.

I have been receiving calls and texts from my father’s side of the family calling me an AH.

AITA for wanting my fiancé’s niece to be the flower girl than my father’s wife’s daughter?

At the end of the day, it’s OP’s wedding, and she has the final say!

Her Dad helping pay makes things complicated, but he should have communicated with her if he thought that meant getting a say in planning the wedding!

Reddit said it sounded like OP’s Dad was using the funds he gave as an excuse to try and insert himself back into her life.

Others said that OP’s Dad unfortunately had to face the consequences of his own actions!

Many users didn’t view Dad’s proposition as much of a “compromise.”

While this user thought that OP should return his money, even if it meant downsizing their dream wedding.

Dad needs to think long and hard about the vows he made at his wedding, before telling OP what to do with her own!

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.