When you marry someone with kids, you sometimes have to deal with their problems, too.
But what about when they’re adults?
For this man, his adult stepchildren have turned out to be a hand-full, despite his efforts to help.
Let’s see if he’s the a-hole in this situation…
AITA for not allowing my stepchildren to move in?
My wife has 6 children who were 18+ when we met 4 years ago. I have no bio kids.
2 years ago, the youngest daughter moved in. The dynamic between her and my wife created tension in the house.
Additionally, the daughter didn’t believe she should work, provide for herself, or go to college/trade school.
She eventually moved out of state to live with friends because they let her “cook and clean and not work.”
Months later, the oldest son moved in after discharge from the military.
That’s not all, though…
The same weekend, his wife and two young kids also moved in. A week later, he decided to move cross country, leaving us to provide for his family.
9 months ago, my wife and I moved out of state (alone).
After 4 months, we took in the oldest son’s 4 y/o out of concern for his safety. This arrangement may be long-term.
Recently, the middle daughter asked to move after breaking up with her bf.
I said no.
The oldest son suggested moving in, potentially helping with his son.
I said no.
Last night, the youngest daughter asked to move in again. She found a room to rent after her friends decided to move to another apartment without her.
While at the room, she “heard screams from her upstairs neighbor and called the cops.”
She was scared and left.
The kids didn’t handle this well…
I said no. Now she and the oldest daughter aren’t speaking to my wife.
Additional context: I’m self-employed, relatively new business and the sole provider. Taking in the 4 y/o has been quite an adjustment -draining- but he’s a great kid.
I feel some of the stepchildren judge my wife, because we live well, and think she should do more for them.
Honestly, I don’t want to take on the responsibility of others decisions. I’ll assist in solutions, but don’t want to be the solution.
I’ve helped in other ways like paying rent, but drew the line at moving in. AITA?
Let’s see what Reddit thinks…
This commenter doesn’t think any of the kids should live there.
Another Reddit user thinks the wife should speak up.
Several commenters pointed to enabling as the problem.
Overall, there was tons of support for this guy!
Sometimes, you just have to put your foot down.
No matter who starts to cry.
If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.