Babysitting nieces and nephews is a nice thing to do, but should an aunt or uncle be made to feel guilty if they say no to babysitting?
In today’s story, one aunt says no to babysitting her autistic nephew, and now she’s wondering if she should have said yes.
Because nothing says family like a guilt trip!
Let’s see how the story plays out…
AITA for refusing to babysit a special needs stepnephew
I (24f) recently moved to the same city as my brother.
My brother has my niece Olivia (10f) with his late wife.
He’s been married for two years to Kate who has a kid from a previous relationship, Tim (7m).
Tim is autistic. Tim alternates one week with his dad and another with my brother and Kate.
At the last minute, Kate asked her to babysit Tim.
I agreed to babysit Olivia today while my brother and Kate run some errands for 5-6 hours.
Tim was supposed to be with his dad.
The night before, Kate called and asked me to watch Tim as well as there was some emergency at his dad’s and he dropped Tim off at her place.
Kate said Tim would be fine just watching some movies and then a nap. As long as I stick to this routine there should be no problem.
She would provide the movies and the snacks he was comfortable to eat.
She said she would only babysit Olivia.
The thing was, I planned to take Olivia to a cafe she told me she wanted to visit. It was supposed to be a surprise.
Having to stay home with Tim would greatly change the flow of our day.
In addition, I have met Tim like twice and don’t know him well. I have no experience with special needs kids and didn’t think I was equipped to look after one.
Due to these reasons, I refused to babysit Tim. I told them I could only take Olivia as previously agreed.
Kate and her brother were very upset at her decision.
My brother and Kate called me AH for not helping out.
They told me an extra kid cost me almost nothing while their only other option was to bring Tim to Kate’s mom who can’t drive and lives almost an hour away.
She had a great day with Olivia.
They still brought Olivia over, and we had a great time.
They picked up Olivia 2 hours later than they were supposed to, and Tim was crying.
Kate and her brother blame her for Tim being upset.
My brother and Kate said all this could be prevented had I just helped out because Tim would be relaxing at my place instead of stuck in traffic and getting cranky.
I just told them emergencies happen and I really was not ready to be their plan B.
Kate called me playing favorites and not seeing Tim as my family. AITA?
It was really sweet of her to plan a fun day for her niece.
Let’s see how Reddit responded…
This reader thinks she made the right decision.
This reader is also on her side.
It would’ve been different if her brother and sister-in-law were the ones with the emergency.
This reader thinks her brother and sister-in-law should’ve changed their plans.
Here’s the perspective of someone who has experience babysitting autistic children…
Kate should’ve been more understanding.
Instead she expected her sister-in-law to say yes no matter what.
If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.