Everyone has that one college that they dream about attending, the one that you have pinned up on your wall, and whose essay you spend hours revising and revising.

But unfortunately, wanting to go there doesn’t mean you’re attending, whether that be because of low admissions or more often, high tuition!

So when this user’s sister came to him and basically demanded he pay for her step-children’s college tuition, he had to refuse, especially considering how terrible that had been to his family!

Was he wrong to not pay for his niece and nephew?

Decide for yourself!

AITA for not giving my sister’s stepchildren money for college?

I (44m) have been very fortunate in my life and have enough wealth that I was able to save a very nice amount for my son (19m) to pursue the future he wants.

I a also helping two friends pay for their daughter to go to college after some personal and financial issues arose.

This is common knowledge to my family. Which is why my sister and BIL are now angry with me.

My sister and BIL have been married for 6 years and BIL has two children (17f, 16m) with his ex.

And while OP had the money to send her son to college, his sister wasn’t so lucky….

The children’s mother abandoned them during the divorce and my BIL has raised them since.

My sister and BIL are not as financially secure as me and there’s not a lot of money for my sister’s stepchildren to attend college.

They brought this topic up during a Sunday dinner with our whole family, minus my sister’s stepchildren, together.

But there was a specific reason the step children weren’t in attendance…

My sister’s step children weren’t there because they have never liked or accepted my sister or us and now they are more independent teens they refuse to “play pretend” to quote them.

Even before they reached this stage, they fought my BIL every time they were made attend anything with us.

All throughout dinner my sister and BIL brought up college, my sister’s stepchildren, how they were sad they could not afford the best for the kids.

The oldest in particular wasn’t going to be able to afford her dream college.

After the dinner, OP was on the receiving end of some harsh criticism from his sister!

When dinner ended and we were all leaving they approached me.

They called me greedy for not stepping in to pay for the stepchildren’s college when I had paid for another child some years ago and my son chose to go into a trade instead of college.

I told them those were different circumstances. They said the stepchildren are family while the girl I helped several years ago was not.

OP argued that just because she wasn’t blood doesn’t mean she isn’t family…

I said she was not family in the traditional sense but she did consider me an uncle and we had a close relationship.

While my sister’s stepchildren did not consider me as any kind of family and had made their stances perfectly clear for the last six years.

My sister and BIL told me I’m the person who clearly doesn’t consider them family because I would love them regardless of how they feel.

They said it showed what a truly greedy and selfish person I am.

AITA?

Demanding money from your family is already tacky enough, but demanding money for the kids who vocally hate you and your family is another level!

Reddit said at the end of the day, you’re not obligated to pay for anything but your own kids.

This user said that not everyone gets to go to their number one choice for college.

Many said that it’s OP’s money to do what he wants with.

 

And this user said that just because OP paid for one kid doesn’t mean he has to pay for every kid.

You don’t always get what you want, sorry!

If you liked that post, check out this one about an employee that got revenge on HR when they refused to reimburse his travel.