When you lose a parent at a young age it can be absolutely devastating.

What happens when your surviving father tries to keep you from your mom’s side of the family?

That is what the poor young lady in this story is experiencing and she wants to know if she is handling it properly.

Take a look.

AITA for telling my dad in front of his ILs that I’d rather live with my grandparents?

After my mom died my dad relied on her parents for 3 years to take care of me.

I (15m) was 3 when mom died.

That is nice of them to step in.

They would pick me up at 7am from dad’s house and take me to their house and dad would pick me up at 8pm after he was finished work/errands.

They were more like parents to me than he was.

Sometimes parents have to work a lot to make ends meet.

He worked 6 days a week and typically most Sunday’s I spent at least 4 or 5 hours with them too.

They took me to my first day of school, picked me up early if I was sick, they were there when I was sick.

My earliest memories are of my time with them. I don’t really remember dad from back then.

This changed when my dad met Beth.

One minute it was me going to my grandparents every day and then Beth lived with us and suddenly I was home with her instead.

Why would he remove them from her life completely?

My dad and grandparents fought about it a lot and he ended up telling me when I was 7 that I wasn’t going to see them anymore and he and Beth were getting married.

A month before the wedding, I was sitting in front of a judge and being asked questions about my dad, my grandparents and stuff.

The judge was nice.

I don’t remember a lot of our talk. But afterward I did get to see my grandparents again.

This dad is not putting his son first.

My dad wasn’t happy. I was 10 when my grandparents admitted they had to take dad to court to see me again.

My dad hates that I see my grandparents as much as I do (three days a month, one overnight a month and for a day around my birthday and Christmas).

He hates that I leave my half siblings behind to go and see them.

There are times he has talked about going back to court and has asked me if I’d say I don’t like going without my siblings, and I always tell him I wouldn’t say that.

Beth hates my grandparents too, but for a different reason.

She is sabotaging the relationship by trying to force it.

She blames them for me rejecting a closer relationship with her because they never allowed me to feel like I didn’t have a mom.

And I do feel that way kinda. It’s hard to describe.

I know she’s not here. I can’t speak to her. But I still don’t feel ‘motherless’.

I don’t want to have that kind of relationship with Beth and it upsets her.

I don’t think it’s cool for her to want that so badly, because I’m sure she’d hate to be forgotten by my half siblings.

So I don’t like her much for that.

My dad ******* more about my grandparents now than he did when I was younger.

My half siblings are old enough to know I go to grandparents and they can’t come.

He also knows I prefer being with my grandparents and he hates it.

Beth’s parents and siblings and their spouses were at our house Saturday night for a dinner party and dad was crabbing about my grandparents to them.

Everyone was acting like my grandparents were bad people for taking dad to court and for not letting me forget mom.

Dad said during the party that he’ll never understand why I want to go there so badly still.

I guess that isn’t the right time for this subject.

I said I’d rather live with my grandparents than him.

Everyone went quiet and dad made me go to my room.

He was so mad yesterday and he told me I should know better than to try and humiliate him like that.

AITA?

I can’t imagine what dad and stepmom are thinking here.

I’m sure the people in the comments will have plenty to say.

Exactly, it’s like they can’t see what they are doing.

This comment sums it up nicely.

Nothing wrong with planning ahead.

Exactly. Dad did this to himself.

Yeah, dad’s behavior is unacceptable.

Dad and stepmom are really hurting their relationship with their son.

I can’t imagine removing someone from my child’s life who loves them.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.