Adjusting to a life with a newborn often feels like an uphill battle. It’s up to new parents to juggle the responsibilities equitably.
This couple comes to a standstill when the new mom’s plea for help clashes with the new dad’s highly anticipated trip with his friends.
Read on to find out how it all went down.
AITA for Asking My Husband to Cancel His “Bro’s Only” Trip to Help Me With Our Newborn After He Promised He Would?
I (30F) gave birth to our first child, Olivia, two months ago.
Being a first-time mom has been both beautiful and overwhelming.
My husband, Jake (32M), was incredibly supportive during the pregnancy and promised that after Olivia was born, he would be there for me every step of the way, especially during those challenging first few months.
Jake made plans that he had been looking forward to, but he promised they wouldn’t get in the way.
Before Olivia was born, Jake and his friends had been planning a “bro’s only” trip for this summer—a week-long vacation to a cabin in the mountains for hiking, fishing, and bonding.
When the trip was being discussed, I reminded Jake that Olivia would only be a few months old, and we would be deep in the newborn phase.
He reassured me that if things got too tough, he would cancel the trip to help me out, and I trusted him.
The adjustment to parenthood has been very rough for the new mom.
Now that Olivia is here, things have been harder than I anticipated.
Between the sleepless nights, breastfeeding struggles, and just trying to adjust to motherhood, I’ve been feeling overwhelmed. Jake has been helpful, but I can tell he’s excited about this trip, which is coming up next month.
She decides to take Jake up on his offer for support.
Last week, I asked Jake if he could consider canceling the trip, reminding him of his promise.
I told him that I’m struggling and that having him gone for a whole week would be really tough on me.
Jake isn’t exactly receptive and suggests other alternatives.
He seemed surprised and a bit hurt that I was asking him to cancel. He said he’s been looking forward to this trip for months, and that he needs a break, too.
He also pointed out that his parents live nearby and could help if I needed support while he was away.
She tries to reason with him, explaining her point of view.
I understand that Jake needs a break and wants to spend time with his friends, but I can’t help feeling like this is a time when I really need him by my side.
I tried to explain that while I appreciate his parents’ help, it’s not the same as having him here.
But Jake still feels slighted by her request.
Jake said that I’m being unfair by asking him to cancel the trip after all the planning that went into it and that I need to trust him to make sure I’m supported even if he’s not physically there.
Now, we’re at a bit of a standoff.
She consults her support group, and they’re torn on what she should do next.
Some of my friends think I should let him go, saying that it’s important for him to have some time away, especially after all the stress of becoming a new dad.
But others agree that it’s too soon for him to take off for a week, and that he should prioritize being home with me and Olivia.
So AITA for asking my husband to cancel his “bro’s only” trip to help me with our newborn after he promised he would?
Neither of them are happy about the current situation.
Redditors chime in with their two-cents.
He made a promise, now he needs to go through with it, according to this user.
This redditor suspects Jake doesn’t have his priorities in order.
The truth may be hard for him to hear, but that’s life.
Jake had better get comfortable with makes sacrifices, because good parents make sacrifices every day.
This couple will have to navigate more than just sleepless nights if they can’t find a way to restore balance.
Both promises and priorities are being tested here.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.