Her Mom Made Her Go To Therapy To Try To Blend Their Family, But Since Her Mom Won’t Take The Therapist’s Advice She Wants To Stop Going

Trisha Leigh

7 mins ago

Source: Shutterstock/Reddit

It’s a tough truth that blending families is tough no matter the situation.

Even when everyone is on board for the transition, you have to pay close attention to make sure you keep things on track.

When this girl’s father passed, her mother remarried and tried to erase his existence.

Now, she’s not listening to their therapist as far as how to mend things at home, so the poster is ready to quit.

Check it out.

AITA for telling my mom to listen to the therapist or I won’t keep going to therapy with her?

My mom and I (16f) are in therapy together. She wanted it to include my sister (18) but my sister told her she has nothing she wants to work on in therapy.

I didn’t get a choice at first but I was okay with going to therapy with mom.

I know we have a lot of stuff to address and some of it has been addressed already but my mom keeps shutting down the therapist while refusing to listen and it’s getting harder to see the point of family therapy.

Mom refuses to meet with the therapist 1:1 and since a session where we spilled our guts she’s talking over the therapist a lot and trying to make me feel the way she does.

She wants my sister to feel the way she does too.

Her mom made them feel badly about her marriage to their dad, causing a lot of resentment.

I should explain stuff. My dad’s dead.

My mom got married again. I was 7 and my sister was 9 when we lost dad and we were 10 and 12 when mom got married again.

In the weeks before the wedding mom said she’d never been happier, she’d never been really in love before, how she found her true love, her soul mate, how he was perfect and the best partner and father ever.

Her husband has no kids just so you guys know.

My sister and I didn’t like hearing her talk like dad, because dad. She was still married to him when he died and we thought they were happy. Mom talked like her husband was the best person to ever exist.

She always talks about him in such a positive light still. Nobody can think he has flaws. We don’t agree and we’re not close to him.

Then, she got mad when they didn’t want her husband to be their new dad.

Mom didn’t like us not getting closer to her husband and she always called him our dad. We fought with her a lot and we rejected him when he’d reach out to get closer to us.

I try to stay nice or whatever when I talk to him. But I also don’t try to make him someone I’m close to or trust or would confide in.

I guess it’s an issue for him and mom’s marriage and with my sister not speaking to either of them since she moved out in May, mom went into “save my marriage” mode.

Therapy isn’t exactly helping.

During the spill your guts session I admitted that it hurt to hear mom talk about her husband like he was better than dad, that she calls him my dad.

That part of why I refuse to let him in is because I feel like someone needs to stay loyal to dad and love him the best. Mom said her husband is a better man than dad.

He’s older, dad was young and never got a great job, made her work and they were together for us. But her husband is so much better and can offer us more. That he’s better for her because he’s a real man.

She also said we shouldn’t care so much about dad’s feelings because he’s dead or some weird loyalty to him. She said he doesn’t need it.

But she wouldn’t answer when asked to put herself in those shoes.

She doesn’t see that changing.

Mom pushes more than ever now to get me to love her husband and to think he’s better than dad.

And with her basically ignoring the therapist I told her she needs to start listening or I won’t go anymore.

Mom said it’s not my call and only children run away like that.

AITA?

My heart goes out to this girl.

Let’s hear what Reddit has to say.

They say mom is being super childish.