Money issues can complicate relationships, especially when someone is in need.

So, what would you do if your sibling asked you to split a large medical bill, but you simply didn’t have the financial means to contribute?

Would you find a way, even if it meant taking out a loan? Or would you stand your ground and refuse?

In the following story, one woman finds herself in this very situation. Here’s the full scoop:

AITA for refusing to help my brother pay for our mom’s surgery?

My mom is 65, and she recently found out she needs knee replacement surgery that insurance won’t fully cover.

My older brother called me to ask if I could contribute half of the out-of-pocket expenses, which come to about $12,000.

The thing is, I’ve been financially struggling for the past few years. I recently had to take out a loan for my car, and I’ve been barely managing to stay on top of my bills.

My brother, on the other hand, has a high-paying job, a huge house, and takes vacations all the time.

I explained to him that I just don’t have that kind of money right now, but he wouldn’t let it go.

Her brother is upset, and her mother has no idea what’s going on.

He accused me of being selfish and not caring about our mom’s health.

He said that he’s already contributing more than his share since he’s the one taking care of her day-to-day, and he’s right – I live in a different city, so he shoulders most of the caregiving burden.

But it’s not like I don’t care about our mom. I love her, but I feel like my brother doesn’t understand my financial situation.

He told me I should just take out another loan to help, but the thought of adding more debt is terrifying.

Now, my brother isn’t speaking to me, and I feel guilty whenever I talk to our mom because I haven’t told her about this.

She knows she’ll need help with the surgery, but I don’t think she realizes the fight it’s causing between my brother and me.

Here’s where things got really heated.

The tension escalated when I suggested that my brother, given his financial standing, might be able to contribute more than half, which sent him over the edge.

He said I was taking advantage of his success and not stepping up when it mattered most.

He pointed out that he’s the one sacrificing his time and energy by looking after Mom and that the least I could do was help financially. I know he’s under a lot of stress, but I can’t give what I don’t have.

Our conversations have become heated, with both of us feeling misunderstood.

Now, my brother is talking about cutting ties if I don’t come through.

I feel torn between my responsibilities and my financial reality.

AITA?

Yikes. There’s a huge difference between wanting to help but not being able to and just not wanting to help at all.

Let’s see what the readers over at Reddit have to say about her situation.

This person has a great point!

Here’s someone who thinks the brother is out of line.

There must be something she can do to help.

Medicare is an excellent option that should be explored.

Sounds like the brother is overwhelmed.

If she can’t afford to help financially, she should find other ways to help their mother rather than relying on her brother for everything.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.