Balancing family obligations and personal boundaries can be difficult, especially when kids want in on plans that just aren’t meant for them.

So, what do you do when a young cousin wants to attend your pajama party, but you say no, and then her mother tries to guilt-trip you into it?

Do you give in?

Or do you stand your ground and refuse?

In today’s story, one young woman finds herself in this very situation.

Here’s what happened.

AITA for refusing to include my younger cousin in my “pajama party”?

I (21f) have a younger cousin who’s 11.

When she was younger, we had a very close bond.

She’s my only cousin, and I always loved children so I loved looking after her.

But as she grew up we started being less close, partly because I moved away and we see each other less, but also because she turned into a bit of a brat.

She’s still a nice kid, and I like to see her at family events, but she’s a bit spoiled and entitled.

I think that’s because she’s an only child, and her mother had many failed pregnancies before she had her (or so I’ve heard), so her parents give her anything she wants and treat her like a princess.

For that reason, she sometimes throws tantrums over unreasonable things and gets very angry when things don’t go her way.

I have a few examples, but I’ll try to make this post as short as possible, so if you want to know, I’ll gladly answer.

It all started with an innocent conversation.

So, on Sunday, we had a family dinner, and she was there.

As I was talking with the adults a bit, they asked if I had plans for the week or something. I told them that I was getting together with my friends on Friday and that they were coming to my place.

She overheard and asked me if she could come.

I didn’t think she was being serious because 1. She lives 2 hours away, and 2. It would be weird for her to be there.

But apparently she was serious, because I received a text from her mother yesterday asking for the info for my “pajama party.”

The party isn’t a place for kids, but the mother refuses to accept that.

I told her that it was a misunderstanding and that my cousin wasn’t invited, but that I’d love to do something with her on Saturday or another weekend.

She started telling me that my cousin really wanted to come, that I should be a nice cousin and let her come, that she was old enough to do things with me, and that it probably wouldn’t bother my friends.

Here’s the thing: we planned on having a cocktail night inspired by our ex-relationships (like some people have done on TikTok).

So I told her that she couldn’t come because it wasn’t a “pajama party” but a drinking night and that we would be discussing things that aren’t necessarily appropriate for a kid her age.

She’s now telling me that I’m doing everything I can to exclude my cousin, that I’m mean, that I’m putting my friends over my family, and she’s trying to guilt trip me into inviting her.

I really don’t know, is it wrong of me to not invite her?

AITA?

Yikes! That’s awkward.

Let’s see what the readers over at Reddit had to say about her situation.

A bizarre situation, indeed.

This person thinks she’s just after free babysitting.

As this person points out, it’s obviously an adult-only party and a kid doesn’t belong there.

Here’s someone who thinks the mother should have her make other plans.

For this person, it’s a hard no.

The aunt needs a reality check.

Her daughter doesn’t belong at such a party, and it’s incredible that she can’t see that on her own.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.