A healthy marriage requires healthy communication.

In this case, this man’s wife is not quite keeping up with the house chores and their kids refuse to pitch in while the husband doesn’t have time or energy to pick up after all of them.

So he hires a maid… but his wife disagrees with his solution.

Could he be in the wrong?

Let’s analyze the situation.

AITA because I pay for a maid to clean the house before I come home?

I work out of town and my wife stays home with our two teen kids.

When I’m home I take care of the housework to give my wife a break.

The kids are supposed to help around the house in return for me paying for their phones and stuff.

My wife chooses not to enforce that while I’m gone.

She doesn’t ask them to help around the house.

Our income is split thusly.

We pay all our bills. Including the kid’s phones.

We set aside money for retirement, vacations, emergencies, etc.

What is left over is split evenly between her and me.

So we each have money for fun stuff separately.

For the last eight months or so she has made very little effort to keep the house clean while I’m gone.

But she gets very upset if I just let it stay messy when I’m home.

She says that the kids are too busy with extracurricular activities and their jobs to help and that she gets overwhelmed.

The house stays a little too much on the messy side until the husband comes home and cleans it.

She does not work. But kids are in high school.

I bought them a car and I pay for everything except fuel.

They are responsible for getting themselves to extracurriculars and whatever else they want to do.

I told her that it wasn’t fair for me to have to clean up four weeks of mess on my two weeks off.

That she should be forcing the kids to do their part.

She says it’s too hard.

Two shifts ago I told the kids I was done paying for their phones and car bills.

The car was paid for cash so there isn’t a loan or anything. Just insurance, registration, maintenance, that stuff.

I took the money and I paid for a maid to come and clean up the day before I get home.

That way I can just maintain it until I leave.

This sounds like a good plan that will benefit everyone in the long run.

But his wife doesn’t agree.

My wife is mad that the kids have to pay their own bills, and that I’m “cheating” by paying someone else to do my chores.

I’m not. I’m paying someone to do theirs.

I found out she’s been giving the kids money out of her share to pay their bills.

She is now mad that I have money for my hobbies but she does not. I don’t really care.

She needs to do her part and clean up and parent.

AITA?

The entire family needs to sit down and talk.

Let’s see what Reddit has to say about this situation.

A reader shares their thoughts.

Another reader agrees with his solution.

This commenter thinks this is on her.

Someone agrees the wife is the one in the wrong.

Another commenter chimes in.

This reader has a few strong opinions on the matter.

Sometimes people just won’t listen.

His family needed the reality check.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.