A child losing their parent at a young age is an incredibly sad thing.

While the surviving parent may move on and remarry, the child will most likely not move on in the same way.

For example, in today’s story, a mom remarries after her husband dies, and she changes her kids’ names from their dad’s name to a hyphenated version with her new husband’s name.

Her son is furious about this and wants to use his original last name.

Let’s see how the story unfolds…

AITA for not using my hyphenated last name?

When my mom and stepdad got married, they hyphenated their last names and changed our names too. Our being me (16m) and my sister (12f) and my step siblings (13f and 11f). I was 7 when they got married.

My mom, sister and I had the same last name as dad before. He died when I was 5. My parents were getting divorced at the time, and after he died mom changed her name back to her original last name.

My stepdad wasn’t ever married, and his kids had their mom’s last name, but she was out of their lives by the time he and my mom started dating.

OP didn’t want his name changed.

They “asked” if we were all okay with the name change.

I said no, but they did it anyway.

They gave me a lecture on the importance of it and why I should be more open-minded. Then I was grounded because I told them I didn’t care and I wouldn’t use the new name because it was stupid and this wasn’t my family.

So there’s always been a really negative association with the hyphenated name.

OP doesn’t want to go to therapy just because he prefers his dad’s last name.

When I could, I’d use my original last name/dad’s last name. I kept it a secret though because I knew I’d get lectured more and forced to go to therapy, and I don’t want or feel like I need therapy over this.

And I don’t want to go to some religion therapy who tells me to “respect my parents” and who’ll say my stepdad is my dad a bunch.

And I know it would happen because one of my best friends goes to the same church as my mom and stepdad and us. They were in family therapy in church because of their parents divorce and dad remarrying.

My friend was told over and over that their new stepmom was also their mom and was told they should not deny them that title because of biology.

OP’s mom found out that he’s been using his original last name.

My mom and stepdad found out anyway because my sister did and she decided she was going to use it too, even though she calls stepdad ‘dad’.

When my mom questioned her about it, she told her if I use a different name then she will too.

My mom went through my stuff for school and found stuff with the name on it. She told my stepdad, and the two of them lectured me and punished me for not using the hyphenated last name. They said it is my name now whether I like it or not and refusing to use it won’t change the truth. They said I was a bad influence on my sister and that I might want to destroy the family but I would fail. My mom said the fact my sister uses terms like “real dad” for our dad shows I’m being rude and disrespectful and the name is just the icing on the cake.

AITA?

At 18 OP can legally change his name back to his original name, and he should since that’s obviously the name he prefers. It’s too bad his mom is trying to force a new name on him.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story…

Just two more years, and OP can legally change his name.

It’s about honor not disrespect.

Thankfully, OP will be 18 in less than two years.

This is a boundaries issue.

This reader suggests calling the “real dad” “bio dad.”

I would be counting down the days until I turned 18.

If you liked that story, check out this post about a group of employees who got together and why working from home was a good financial decision.