Having a family that is close is good in most situations, but there are limits to how close a family should be.

What would you do if your family did not allow you to hang out with anyone else, and even when you were an adult they expected you to live with them?

That is what the young woman in this story experienced, so she went low contact and is even thinking of cutting them off completely.

Let’s read all the details…

AITA for not reaching out to my family and refusing their demands?

I grew up in a “closed” extended family.

We were pretty close with my aunts/uncles/cousins, often living together with one family unit in a single room (around 15 people in the house), however we didn’t have much contact with non-family members.

As kids, we weren’t allowed to have friends.

There were really strict rules.

We were allowed to go to school, but had to come back home when it ended.

No hanging out with classmates and no after school activities.

For me, personally, being the youngest one, I was usually an afterthought, even for my parents.

Needless to say, I was suffering from depression.

College changed everything.

I moved out of the house when I went to college, and started exploring my freedom.

However, even then, I was expected to call everyday and come back home every weekend.

As time went on, I started to distance myself by skipping phone calls and not going back every weekend.

Eventually I broke off all contact with my family.

Reconnecting meant a LOT of yelling.

A year after graduating, I had a pretty stable life for myself and I thought to get back in touch with at least my parents and siblings.

The first few conversations (over phone) were just them yelling at me, and I endured it.

After months of this, we were finally able to have some conversation. And every time, I was the one who called.

When I finally visited back home there was more yelling and they expected me to move back into the house.

It wasn’t worth the effort.

I refused their demand, which lead to more yelling again.

This continued for a few more months without any progress.

So, I started to distance myself again.

That was over a decade ago.

They only call when they want something.

Last year, I started to get phone calls from several family members.

However, every single call follows the same routine; first they try to make me feel guilty about breaking contact and not calling or visiting (I just hang up if they start yelling), and then they want something from me.

Usually they want money or have some of my cousins move in with me.

My response to that is always no.

AITA?

This is a very abusive situation and as sad as it sounds, I think she needs to cut off all contact with the family.

Let’s read what some of the people in the comments had to say about this situation.

Here is someone recommending that she change her contact info.

They really are very toxic.

This commenter says the family is a cult.

Here is someone else calling them a cult.

This person says they sound very controlling.

This family sounds very manipulative.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.