One young woman, struggling to move out amid financial difficulties, is caught in a tug-of-war between her manipulative mother and an emotionally distant father.

After being pushed too far, she finally draws the line, telling her father he has no right to control her decisions—despite his absence and other family commitments.

Read on for the story.

AITA for telling my father he cannot tell me what to do

I’m 21F, and trying to move out. I live in England.

It’s been a long process due to some financial issues, but I’m getting there – I have an end goal in mind which is good.

My father does not live with us.

He works abroad.

Him and my mother are not on good terms but for some reason won’t divorce, just separated.

He also has another family which may add context.

I made the mistake of talking about me moving out within earshot of my mother a while ago.

Ever since then, she’s been trying to manipulate me, not realizing that the curtains have been lifted from my eyes.

Looks like she missed the memo that you’re not moving out…you’re breaking free!

I see every word for what it is – a power play, an attempt to chain me to a toxic environment that uses me as a scapegoat.

When her final card, telling me to stay because I’m useless and can’t be independent and would be better off saving my money for a car instead of rent and bills, didn’t work on me – she called my dad to talk some ‘sense’ into me.

The call from him was triggering, but I pushed through and said I don’t want to live here.

I hate that I’m either being taken advantage of or demeaned.

She’s playing guilt, but you’re playing for freedom.

He kept pushing, so in anger I said I hate her.

That he cannot convince me to stay just to slave away for people who don’t care about me.

I said I rather be in debt and pay my rent in money, instead of paying it with my mental health as I’ve done my entire life.

He said “are you refusing to listen to your father?”

I said “Maybe you’d have a leg to stand on if you were here, but you’re working abroad, have another family that you don’t even live with either and are probably thinking about.

You’ve got enough on your plate so please don’t bother with me now, my decision is set.”

He was furious and called my siblings in anger ranting about me.

They’ve not said anything really.

My mother then got wind of what I said and has been badgering me ever since to apologize to him.

When your dad’s advice is as absent as he is, it’s hard to take it seriously.

I admit I have been avoiding his calls because I was angry when I said everything.

I’m feeling slightly guilty now for causing a rift.

AITA for shutting down my father, arguing with him and telling him he cannot tell me what to do?

Despite the fallout from her father and mother, this daughter stands firm on her decision to break free.

And Reddit thinks that’s pretty bold–in a non-jerk kind of way.

This person says you can’t break up a family that’s already broken, right?

This person congratulations her on starting to become a grown up.

This person gives some good advice.

Sometimes the best way to escape a toxic environment is to close the door—whether they like it or not.

It can still be hard the first time, though!

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.