Family relationships are tough.

People who can’t let go of the IDEA of a relationship can be even tougher.

When these women found out they had a half-brother, they wanted to welcome him with open arms – but he wanted no part of it.

Check out the details below.

AITA for telling my wife and SIL they need to accept their half brother doesn’t want a relationship?

Six months ago my wife (26f) and her sister (24f) learned they have an older half brother from their mom.

They never met this man or heard their mom or anyone talk about him before.

The only thing they know is he was primarily raised by his paternal grandparents.

It’s the stuff of a movie plot! A secret half brother? How mysterious!

When they found out he existed they hired an internet PI to help them find him.

The PI found his socials and his full name. From there my wife and her sister made contact.

There was no reply and my SIL decided she’d message once a week in case he wasn’t getting the notifications.

She and my wife did everything to convince themselves he wasn’t responding for some other reason other than he didn’t want a relationship.

But of course…

After a few months of this he replied once saying he wanted to be left alone and did not want a relationship or any form of contact with them.

The next thing his profiles were made private so the only people who could could interact with him were friends and followers.

My wife’s pregnant with our first child right now and some people have suggested the hormones are driving her to obsess over this.

But neither are letting this go.

I’m trying to be a good wife and supportive but they’re talking about doing things that would be like stalking or harassment in trying to get this man to agree to a relationship.

They don’t see why he’d reject them when they never knew he existed.

Things could get real bad here.

My SIL showed me his reply.

I didn’t say this to them because I’m not sure, but it sounds to me like he knew they existed and chose to stay away.

I could be wrong of course.

I suggested therapy to them but they said a therapist wouldn’t help them have a relationship with their brother.

Well no, but neither is your brother, so.

The other night my wife and I were discussing baby names again and then my wife and SIL started talking about their half brother and how he should be around the baby when he’s born.

This then turned into a “how do we get in front of him to plead for a chance” and that’s when I told them they were handling this badly and they need to learn to accept his no.

I said they don’t have to like it, they’re allowed their own feelings on it, but they need to accept he said no.

I told my wife her half brother was taking up more mental space than our unborn son and he’ll be born soon and our lives will change.

And the reaction?

SIL said I wasn’t being understanding enough.

My wife didn’t argue either way.

She looked really thoughtful though and she’s been quiet since the other night.

AITA?

So, who’s in the wrong here, according to the internet?

The answer…probably won’t surprise you:

Real family isn’t just genetics:

You can be supportive and still call something out:

Some commenters had been there, done that:

And some were pretty mad about it:

Unfortunately, life doesn’t always play out like a movie.

Part of caring about someone means respecting their wishes.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.