There’s nothing more frustrating than someone trying to overshadow your big moment.

What would you do if your parents hijacked your engagement year to celebrate themselves, and even planned their vow renewal on your birthday? Would you try to look at it in a positive way? Or would you step back and protect your own joy, even if it meant some family fallout?

In the following story, one person finds themselves in this exact situation and decides to put their own future first. Here’s how it all played out.

AITAH for not attending my parents vow renewal.

For context, I got engaged last year to my girlfriend of many years.

My parents of 30+ years marriage decided to announce a month after being engaged that they are renewing their vows on my birthday this year.

For the past year, we have not been able to discuss anything in regards of our wedding plans without my parents talking over us about their plans.

We are now getting into crunch time for our wedding in 2026, and don’t want to add further stress by attending and spending unnecessary costs. We are funding our wedding completely by ourselves with no help, which I feel is important to mention, as some people have outside help.

Now, they’re near a stalemate.

The last straw for me was my mother not wanting to attend my fiancée’s first dress appointment. She never explicitly said this but from her tone speaking with her, she did not sound excited at all.

It worked out that the bridal shop limited the amount of guest anyway, so my mom didn’t have to attend.

Lastly, my mother had cancer the last few years, which is now in remission, and my dad finally retired, so I feel as if they are just celebrating.

I know that my parents are going to retaliate by possibly not coming to my wedding if I don’t attend theirs. Which would be disappointing, but I have to put my family first.

AITA?

Wow! There’s a lot to unpack here.

Let’s check out what the people over at Reddit have to say about this whole situation.

This person has a good point.

For most people, this is easier said than done.

Jealousy is a tough emotion.

This is a great way to look at it.

He needs to prioritize his wedding.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.