Here’s the thing about weddings: they’re expensive.

There’s all sorts of politics and hurt feelings about who is and isn’t invited to what, but an element that often gets left out of that consideration (when it’s not YOUR wedding) is that every extra seat and extra plate is also extra money, and in this economy? Well, things can get dicey.

Would you be upset if you weren’t invited to some of your spouse’s friend’s wedding festivities but your spouse was invited to everything?

This couple is dealing with this exact situation, and they’re not sure how to proceed.

AITA for going to my best friends wedding dinner?

I (M21) and my wife (F22) have gotten in a fight over me going to a wedding dinner.

I am a groomsman for my friend of 20 years – our birthdays are one day apart, we met before we were even in preschool, the whole nine yards.

He’s marrying a girl from out of state, so this last weekend they had a ceremony, dinner, and open house in the other state (about 12 hours away), which I attended.

Today, they’ll be having a dinner and reception.

His wife was invited to most of it, but not all of it.

My wife was invited to all the out of state events, but couldn’t make it due to work.

Today, they’ll be having a wedding dinner and a reception.

The bridal party’s partners are not invited to the dinner, but they are welcome at the reception (3 hours after the dinner starts).

So, who’s in the wrong here?

My wife is very frustrated that I didn’t stick up for her being invited, and insists that I not go so that they know what they did was wrong.

She has remarked that after this, we will never hang out with them.

Am I wrong for thinking that me going to the dinner is not that big of a deal?

I can understand that she’s upset about not being invited, but is she overreacting?

Here’s what that comments made of this on Reddit:

Who gets this bent out of shape over not being invited to *one* thing?

The implications about the friendship threat are troubling.

You’re not an exception, why are you trying to make yourself one?

Yikes on bikes, dude.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.