Imagine inviting a friend to go to a concert with you, but the friend says she can’t afford to go. After inviting a few more friends who do agree to go, would you follow up with the initial friend you invited to let her know who else is going, or would you assume that it doesn’t matter since she said she can’t afford to go?

In today’s story, one woman finds herself in this situation, and it doesn’t even cross her mind to update her friend about who is and is not going to the concert. Now, she’s wondering if she messed up.

Let’s read the whole story.

AITA for not telling my friend who else was coming to the concert after she declined the invitation?

I (23F) invited a friend of mine (I’ll call her F) to a concert I was planning to go to with another girl, B.

There’s some tension between B and F’s sister due to a past conflict, but nothing directly between F and B herself. Still, I understand it might make things uncomfortable for her.

When I invited F, she told me she wouldn’t be coming. She gave me a few reasons: she said she didn’t really have the money, had some medical appointments coming up, and mentioned it might feel awkward with G being there.

I understood and didn’t pressure her I just assumed she wasn’t coming and moved on.

The plans changed.

Later, I also invited another friend and her girlfriend (G+H) and it became more of a group plan.

I didn’t think to update F about who else was coming, because from my perspective, she had already said no.

I didn’t intentionally hide anything it just didn’t cross my mind that the guest list might change her decision since she said that she was short on money?

It turns out that money wasn’t really that big of an issue after all.

A few days later, F found out that H was going and told me that if she had known, she would have come too. She seemed upset and said I should have let her know.

I responded that I didn’t think it was necessary to follow up since she had already declined.

She then said she could’ve made an exception if she’d known about H.

Now, they’re both mad.

I got mad that she was making me seem like I did it on purpose.

And she said that it would have been awkward for me to handle two people not talking to each other but I literally don’t care and just wanted to spend time with her because she said we never do.

I also told her that she also invites me to things with people that I have beef with but I remain cordial too? The problem is not even the person but she already said she was short on money and now she has it.

Now I’m wondering if I was wrong for not updating her. I genuinely didn’t mean to exclude her, and I was trying to respect her original choice. But I also understand that from her perspective, maybe she felt left out.

It sounds like it was a misunderstanding. For F, it was about who was going not about the money, but there was no way for OP to know that.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

Her friend can only blame herself.

Her friend needs to take responsibility for making her own plans with friends.

If her friend hadn’t brought up money, it might’ve been different.

How old are these friends?

This person calls the friend weird.

FOMO is real for this friend.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.