You can’t force kids to be close to their stepparents…

And you definitely can’t force them to call you mom or dad!

That’s what’s going on in this story from Reddit and the teenager who wrote it wants to know if she’s doing anything wrong.

Take a look!

AITA for making my dad’s wife feel worthless because I won’t call her my parent?

“My dad got married two years ago when I (17f) was 15 and my sister (19f) was 17.

Our mom passed away when we were 6 and 8 years old so dad was alone for years and we were okay with dad finding someone. The two of us had told him we’d support him getting married again for years.

Here’s the deal…

When we got older we asked him to understand that his new partner would never be a parent or a new mom for us. He respected that and has held up his part of the bargain mostly.

He started dating his wife Claire four years ago. They met online and were long distance throughout the dating stage. She moved in with us when they got engaged which was still two years ago.

My sister didn’t like her from the start but was civil. I thought she was nice enough. We get along better than I expected honestly. But we have an issue and it’s only getting worse.

This is kind of weird…

Claire wants to be seen as our parent. If her and dad are asked if they’re my parents she’s so quick to say yes and if someone asks if there’s a parent there for me and it’s only her she’ll say yes.

I say no.

I have always said no when asked if she’s my parent. I let people know she’s married to my dad but I’ll tell people I know that it was when I was already 15 so I don’t see her that way.

My dad has backed me up on that. But Claire is so bothered by it now that she asked me why I won’t call her my parent. She told me she’s doing her best to be a good one and I told her I’m good with her just being a cool person to me.

It’s never gonna happen!

No need to try and pretend she raised me. I told her when she met me I was already independent enough without her and that hasn’t changed since her arrival.

What I mean by that is I’m used to doing things for myself. If I’m home alone I’ll make whatever meal it’s time for. I do my own laundry 90% of the time and her and dad split doing household laundry the other 10%.

I walk most places or sometimes I’ll get friends to pick me up since I don’t drive. I work part time and have my own money. And I have dad there when I need or want a parent for something. I’ve never asked her to fill that role. I don’t want her to.

She expected to be a parent to me and to my sister. My sister was hostile when Claire mentioned that to her. I tried a more casual and laid back approach but I know it upset her. She told me she doesn’t want to be just a friend or dad’s wife.

Jeez, take a hint…

She wants to be a parent to us. She wants to feel like she has a worth in this family and that the only way she’ll have that is through being acknowledge as a parent. I told her I wasn’t going to do that.

I told her she’s only been in my life for a small amount of time and she didn’t do any parenting. I told her I know she tried but I pointed out again that I didn’t need it.

My dad told her it was unreasonable to expect 15 and 17 year olds to see a new person in that way. He acknowledged it does happen sometimes but largely not.

She brought up how me and my sister make her feel worthless when we won’t let her be called our parent. Dad’s now changed his stance a bit. He told her it was ultimately up to us.

But he’s pressed for me to find a way to compromise and let her be my parent sometimes because she deserves to feel like she has true worth to the family. He asked if it would really be so bad to have two parents and I told him it would never feel right.

I said not just because of mom but because when Claire moved in I was already capable and doing so much and I only rely on him for parenting.

Things are kinda weird now and it’s frustrating.

AITA?”

Here’s what Reddit users had to say about this.

This person said she’s NTA.

Another individual chimed in.

This Reddit user sounded off.

Another person said she’s NTA.

Her stepmom needs to take a hint…

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.