Imagine losing your mother at a young age, and a stepmother steps in and tries to fill that role. When you’re all grown up and ready to have a child of your own, would you want your stepmom in the delivery room with you?

In today’s story, one woman is very clear that she does not want her stepmom in the delivery room with her, but her stepmom won’t drop it.

Keep reading for all the details.

AITA for making it clear to my stepmom that I don’t want her to be present when I give birth?

My stepmom saw a comment I made on a Facebook post several weeks ago that said I would probably have my mom in the delivery room with me if she were still alive.

The post was from a page I follow asking expectant parents if they thought their mom’s being there would bring them some comfort.

She messaged me on Facebook when she saw it and told me I could still have one of my mom’s there, her.

I replied back that it wasn’t her I meant.

Her stepmom was pretty upset about this comment.

I saw her a few days after and she brought up to me how embarrassing it was to have me openly state that on social media where people could see. She said most would assume I have two mom’s and that she would be worthy of being invited.

I told her my reply was not said to embarrass her but I was being honest about my feelings on the topic.

She brought it up more times and tried to advocate for me saying yes.

When I kept saying no she said I was blessed with two mom’s and sometimes I act as though I only have one.

OP explains her history with her stepmom.

The background to this is as follows: I lost my mom when I was 6 and dad remarried just before I turned 8.

My stepmom wanted to adopt me when they got married but I didn’t want that.

My dad didn’t want to waste the money if I’d tell a judge I didn’t want it and said judge sided with me.

I think my stepmom tried to be a good second mom and tried to fill the space my mom used to.

She doesn’t really even think of her as a stepmom.

She didn’t remove mom’s memory but she did compete with her memory a lot.

I never wanted a second mom and always saw her as more of a dad’s wife than a stepmom, but saying stepmom seemed like a compromise to not rock the boat too much.

She has four sons with my dad.

She’s a good mom to them though I think she always wanted a daughter and I do believe that is part of the reason she could never let go of the whole “mom” thing.

Her stepmom keeps pressing to be in the delivery room.

But anyway. The topic was not dropped by my stepmom.

I changed the subject a lot when she brought it up but over the weekend it came up again and she said I was already honoring my mom and MIL with my daughter’s name (not their actual names but associations with them) and I have never acknowledged her as being a mom to me or even a grandma to my daughter and the least I could do is let her be there and let her support me the way I dream my mom would.

She told me she could be my greatest advocate and it would go a long way for acknowledging the mother/daughter nature of our relationship.

OP is not going to change her mind.

I made it very clear to her then that I did not want her there and yes, I want my mom, but she never held that title for me.

I told her that she was my stepmom and she was not someone I would feel comfortable having there for the moment.

She was upset and tried to pull my dad into it but he refused to get involved which… no surprises there.

My stepmom said if I didn’t want her there then I should have at least deleted those comments and she also said I had made it very clear I think nothing of her feelings.

AITA?

A stepmom can never replace a birth mom. This stepmom needs to back off. By pushing, she’ll only push her stepdaughter further away.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

Social media might not have been the best place to make her point.

This person thinks the answer is obvious.

She does not have two moms.

I like this person’s petty suggestion. It’s honestly a good idea.

She gets to decide who she wants in the delivery room.

Her stepmom needs to back off!

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.