Dates can get very emotionally charged for people. Even just general times of year.

It’s strange, but we do seem to keep emotional calendars of sorts, and it can be hard to navigate around that.

You might, by accident, cause a lot more grief than you mean to with your timing.

In this story, a man didn’t mean to make his brother upset, but that’s exactly what happened when he shared good news at a time when his brother was processing trauma.

Let’s read what happened.

AITAH for getting engaged so close to the anniversary of my brother’s car accident?

I, 24M, got engaged to my girlfriend two weeks ago.

Initially my family was excited for me when I told them, with the exception of my 19 year old brother.

Three years ago he was in an awful car accident that left him in really bad shape. That car accident was in August, less than a week after his birthday.

Here’s the conversation he had with his brother.

My brother told me it was selfish and thoughtless to get engaged in the month directly preceding the month of the year that is hardest for him.

He said it’s bad enough that his birthday is ruined for him and nothing but a reminder of his trauma. He says having to pretend to be happy for me when he’s dealing with so much will just make everything that much worse.

I told him I was sorry for not taking the date into consideration, I did it when I did because the moment just felt right.

He said admitting I don’t think about him or what he went through just makes it worse.

Now, his dad is taking his brother’s side.

My dad, who was initially happy for me, is now saying what I did is messed up.

I feel so conflicted.

Obviously, what my brother went through is terrible, and I wouldn’t have done this when I did if I’d known it would upset him.

Should I have foreseen this?

Am I [a jerk] for making such a big decision so close to the anniversary of such a terrible day, or is this something I can’t reasonably have been expected to know would be upsetting?

Is his brother overreacting, or was OP really being insensitive?

Let’s see what the comments say on Reddit:

This person thinks the brother is being ridiculous.

It seems like this involves some misplaced feelings.

This isn’t sustainable.

This should be addressed in another way.

Here’s hoping for a lot of healing all around.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.