TwistedSifter

Woman Wanted A Peaceful Postpartum Experience, But Her Mom Was Devastated When She Was Asked To Stay In A Hotel

A hotel room with bed and basic amenities

Pexels/Reddit

Becoming a first-time parent can be overwhelming.

Something well-meaning grandparents want to help the new parents out, but what they consider help may not always be helpful.

This woman was expecting her first baby and wanted quiet time at home with her husband and newborn.

Her mother offered help and made plans to stay over frequently.

The new mom to be didn’t find that offer helpful.

Read the full story below for all the details.

AITA for telling my mom I don’t want to have overnight guests anymore

I (28F) and my husband (29M) are expecting our first baby in October.

My mom said that she would come after the baby is born so she could help us out for a few days to a week.

She never asked us if we wanted help, just stated she would come.

This woman and her husband preferred that her mom stay in a hotel.

We were leaning towards telling her we wanted her to stay in a hotel.

This is because she lives 3 hours away.

I personally did not want any overnight visitors while having a newborn.

She’s helpful and respectful of boundaries; however, I just wanted to focus on my family without too many lingering guests that I have to entertain.

Her mom planned on visiting them frequently.

I think she was also planning on coming every few weeks to see the baby while I’m on maternity leave.

She talked about how often she wanted to come and the vacation time she saved up.

She told her mom they didn’t want her to stay over during the night.

I broke the news that I didn’t want her staying over all night and that I’d prefer if she stayed in a hotel when she came to visit.

She broke down and cried and sobbed. She was devastated that I even thought of sending her to a hotel.

Her mom insisted they didn’t need to host her.

I told her it’s not on her.

We just don’t want anyone staying the night because it’s too much to host people.

She said, “You wouldn’t have to host me.”

For her, there’s a lot involved if her mom stays for a couple of days.

But really, I mean we would.

Washing the sheets, making the bed, figuring out meals. Extra laundry, entertaining, and talking when I just want to relax.

I don’t want anyone staying over.

Her mom was devastated.

She’s so upset and hurt.

She said that she wouldn’t let us stay over anymore if she’s not allowed to stay over.

She has a guest bedroom. We don’t.

We have a newborn. She is a single person living alone.

She eventually agreed, but her mom was still hurt from it.

We somehow resolved it.

I (reluctantly) agreed to have her come and stay for three nights after the baby is born.

We will see how it goes.

She’s devastated still.

AITA?

It sounds like her mother is trying to be helpful, but sometimes staying with someone isn’t actually helpful.

Let’s find out what others have to say about this on Reddit.

Short and simple.

Hotel or no visit, says this person.

This user shares their personal thoughts.

While this person shares their experience with their mom.

Finally, here’s an honest assumption.

Everyone has different needs and preferences, and people should respect that.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.

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