This dad carefully saved video tapes of his late wife for his daughter’s 18th birthday—a way for her to know the mother she never truly met.

He remarried years ago, and his current wife has always struggled with jealousy over his past.

One day, she decides to throw the tapes away “to give him a head start moving on,” sparking a deep emotional conflict.

Now he’s torn between anger, grief, and trying to make things right for his daughter.

AITA for ignoring my wife for throwing away my late wife video tapes?

I am writing this because I don’t know what to do.

I have a daughter with my late wife and her name is Eleanore.

Her birthday is coming up in 2 weeks and she’s turning 18.

A big birthday!

Background, me and my late wife, Cloé has been dating since college.

We got older and ended up getting married, and after our wedding, she shared news to me that she was pregnant and I was excited that we were expecting our first child.

Since it was our first child we bought a video camera and made little tapes and snippets of her whole pregnancy.

Wholesome things such as us just joking around or having lunch, or talking to our unborn child through the camera.

How cute.

We made a promise to only show Eleanore the tapes until her 18 birthday. Fast forward 2 years after her birth, Cloé passed away due to a drunk driver crashing into her car as she was coming home from her mother’s house.

I was devastated of her passing and went into a deep depression and having to raise our two year old daughter by my self.

My friends tried to get me to go out again and start back dating, but every time I did I felt like I was betraying her.

Wow, how terrible.

Years later when Eleanore was 13, I met Wendy. We met at a gathering for my sister’s birthday and we instantly hit it off.

She didn’t mind that I had a daughter because she had two kids herself and just went through a divorce.

Two years after we got married.

A match made in common occurrences.

Now back to the present. Eleanore 18 birthday is coming up and I kept all the tapes for me to show her.

Mind you her mother died when she was just two, so Eleanore doesn’t remember her touch or her voice.

I was excited to show her the tapes and a week ago I was talking to Wendy about it and I noticed her expression going from happy to looking a bit uncomfortable.

Uh oh.

Wendy would always get uncomfortable when I talk about my late wife.

I don’t say things like “why can’t you be like Cloé” or “Cloé was only supposed to be my first love” but I talk about her in a way to give my daughter a mental picture of how her mother was like.

Wendy has always talked to me about Cloé and how it made her sad that “She can never be like her”. Cloé was a model then started working on her fashion career, and don’t get me wrong she was a really beautiful woman, while Wendy had two kids in college and “not in the best shape” due to her words.

I love both woman how they are and I’ve never had a preference but I feel like Wendy is gaining some jealousy towards Cloé.

I told Wendy that I love her just the way she was and she broke down crying.

So let us get this straight…she’s jealous of your dead wife. Got it.

The next day after that incident she came up to me and apologized for the way she acted last night.

I told her it was okay and it’s good that she felt comfortable to share her feelings, and I gave her a tight hug and a kiss on her forehead.

She asked to see where the tapes were at and I showed her the box of video tapes of my late wife in my closet.

Celebrations are back on track.

Things were going fine until yesterday morning.

I was looking for the tapes because I wanted to put them in a prettier box for my daughter and when I went to go find them, the box wasn’t in my closet.

I looked everywhere to the point I walked downstairs to see my wife laying on the couch watching tv. I asked her about the box and she told me she threw it away with a neutral expression.

My heart dropped and I asked her what did she mean, and she told me that I talk about her too much and that I need to move on with my life so she threw them away as a “head start.”

I’m sorry, WHAT?

I was fuming with anger because not only she threw away what I had left of her, she threw away my daughter big surprise.

We quickly got into an argument and she noticed how angry I was so she started apologizing.

It got to the point I started crying and locked myself in our bedroom.

Wow. Brutal.

It’s the morning and I’m writing this in my office going through my computer finding old files or any type of video of my late wife to give it to my daughter because sometimes my daughter still cries that she never got to “meet” her mother and I really thought it would bring her closer to her.

I’ve been ignoring my wife for the past day and she’s been texting me nonstop about how sorry she is but I really just can’t look at her right now.

It’s getting to the point our mutual friends are texting me to accept her apology and get over it since Cloé died over 10 years ago but I’m trying to ignore them all because they never had someone so close to them died.

I am working on finding these files and I’m starting to think I was overreacting. I don’t know what to do and I really need help.

What was meant to be a loving tribute turned into a clash of grief, jealousy, and miscommunication.

The father is left navigating heartbreak, his daughter’s milestone, and repairing a marriage shaken to its core.

Quite literally no one is on Wendy’s side, and everyone is grieving poor Dad.

This person says she deserves the worst.

This person says oh HECK NO.

This person agrees: Divorce is the only option.

She definitely crossed a line.

There’s probably no going back.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.