Thanks to the fostering and adoption system, children who are born without devoted family to love and care for them are able to find homes where, all being well, they will be supported and provided a loving, healthy upbringing.

However, as the girl in this story found out too young, that is not always the case.

Fortunately, she now has family with whom she is settled, and who love her and support her through life.

It’s great that she is now protected and allowed to live a happy childhood, but sometimes, her older sister is a little too protective.

Read on to find out how that is damaging her other relationships.

AITA for still wanting to visit my old sister?

I (female, 15-years-old) was adopted twice. There’s a lot of people involved so I’m going to use fake names.

The Wilsons adopted me when I was a baby. I lived with them from when I was two weeks old until I was six.

Then I got leukemia (I’m fine now) and they were already kinda over me because I have autism, so they left me at the hospital.

They have a daughter, Alyssa (31, female) that I’m still really close with. When they left me she stopped talking to them, and she still visited me a lot. When she got a good job she started sending me money too.

Let’s see what happened after she left the hospital.

When I was seven, the Millers started fostering me and they adopted me when I was eight.

They already had three kids (Maddie (29), Sophie (26), and Liam (22)) when they adopted me. We all get along except Maddie thinks she’s my other mom.

I see Alyssa one weekend a month. She has a house in the mountains a few hours away, and she has a kid so she isn’t able to pick me up more often anymore.

Then, last year, Alyssa and Maddie got into a huge argument.

Read on to find out what caused the friction between these two ‘older sisters’.

Basically, I had the entire week of Thanksgiving off, so the plan was for Alyssa to pick me up on Friday after school, I’d stay with her until Tuesday, then she’d drop me off and I’ll have Thanksgiving with my family.

It was right after a storm, so there was a lot of snow and some roads were closed.

Then on Monday we were supposed to get a few inches of snow at Alyssa’s house but it ended up being another big storm (the storm was supposed to hit somewhere else but it shifted).

Alyssa and her husband decided it wouldn’t be a good idea to drive through the storm to get me home, so I stayed with them until the next Monday.

And this weather-related delay was the catalyst for some real drama.

It was kinda scary. We kept losing power and the heat wasn’t working so we slept by the fireplace.

Anyways when Alyssa took me home after the storm Maddie was mad that Alyssa decided to keep me there during a big snowstorm instead of taking me home a little early.

She said that Alyssa probably did it on purpose because she asked to start having me on some holidays now that I’m older.

I wanted to get them to stop arguing, so I told Maddie I won’t stay with Alyssa anymore when it snows. So for the rest of winter they came to me and we stayed in hotels instead of me going to their house.

But this situation is making the girl feel quite unhappy.

I really like Alyssa’s house though, and I like visiting in winter because the snow is fun.

It’s starting to snow again soon and Alyssa and I are making plans for me to come back, and I’m going learn how to ski and we’re going visit this really touristy area because they have the best hot chocolate ever.

I was talking to my mom about it (she trusts Alyssa so she’s totally fine with it) and Maddie heard and now she’s mad at me because I promised that I won’t go back there during winter after what happened last year.

My mom told her it’s my choice but Sophie and Liam are saying last year really scared her, so I should just let this go and let Alyssa come here again for a winter.

All this is leaving the young girl feeling very divided.

I really want to go to Alyssa’s house but I feel bad for scaring Maddie.

Am I wrong for wanting to go to Alyssa’s house again?

AITA?

This poor girl has been through so much in her life, it’s great that she has so many people around her now who love her.

But it’s problematic that their love for her is causing so much stress and drama in her life – she needs certainty and continuity, not the people around her at war.

It’s clear that Maddie is jealous of the pre-existing bond that she has with Alyssa, and thinks that it somehow threatens their relationship, despite the girl showing no signs at all of wanting to abandon the family for Alyssa – it’s just causing drama that doesn’t need to be there.

Let’s see what folks on Reddit had to say about this.

This person agreed that Maddie seemed more threatened than concerned.

While others pointed out that Maddie’s assent wasn’t really required.

Meanwhile, this Redditor encouraged her to put her own happiness and life experiences first.

Whatever the drama between Maddie and Alyssa, this girl really doesn’t need to be part of it.

It’s clear that, because of obvious past trauma, she’s keen to keep everyone happy and not displease them – but if she’s to live the truly happy life she deserves, she needs to put herself first every once in a while.

Her mom and Alyssa are trying to help her do that, and it’s a real shame that Maddie is holding her back.

She should be allowed to enjoy her childhood, not be forced to jump through hoops to keep everyone else satisfied.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.