Imagine being a new parent with a newborn baby who is only a few days old. If your mother-in-law called and bashed your parenting decisions, would you listen to her, or would you tell her to mind her own business?

In this story, one new mom is in this situation, and she is so annoyed at something her mother-in-law says that she can’t stay quiet about it. Now, their relationship isn’t the same.

Let’s read all the details.

AITA for telling my MIL off for her comment regarding my 5-day-old?

My husband’s mom called to ask how the baby was doing, and he told her that she was good and was currently taking a nap on him. (She was extremely supportive during the entire pregnancy and was even there for the birth, so her calls were welcomed.)

She responded by saying that it’s not good to let her sleep on us.

An annoying comment, but whatever.

My husband tells her that there’s nothing wrong with it and we love letting her sleep on us.

She found the next comment much more annoying.

Then she proceeded to say, “Don’t build bad habits with my baby”.

That one got to me.

Ignoring the ‘my baby’, I said, “You can’t build habits with a newborn.”

In a sarcastically cheerful tone, she says “Yes you can, I’ve raised three children!”

I matched her tone and said, “Actually, no you can’t! It’s science!”

Then she hung up.

But the conversation wasn’t over. It continued via text.

After that she sends me a VERY long message about how she has never been able to tell how I feel about her and how she hopes one day we can be close, which was news to me because I felt closer with her then any of my own family.

She also said she feels like I don’t want to hear anything she has to say when it comes to the baby, and she wants to be able to give advice and make suggestions. (This was referencing the phone call as well as a couple other things she had suggested previously. I had told her we wouldn’t be doing those things because we already looked into it and decided to do something else.)

Here’s how she responded…

I responded by telling her I had no idea where all this was coming from, as I felt we already had a close relationship, and I apologized for if I ever acted in a way to make her think differently.

I also said that while I didn’t want to invalidate her experience as a mother, I didn’t really want advice unless I ask for it.

I said I’m glad that what she did worked for her, but all babies are different and I’m constantly doing research and making decisions based on that.

I finished off my saying that if I want advice that I will absolutely come to her and I want her to be a HUGE part of our daughter’s life.

Their experience changed after this conversation.

She then said that invalidating her experience as a mother was exactly what I was doing and she was sad that I was being so closed off.

Our relationship has been rocky ever since, and sometimes I wonder if I should have just kept my mouth shut and just smiled and nodded instead.

So, AITA?

No parent likes unsolicited advice. I know the mother-in-law meant well, but she shouldn’t have inserted her opinion. They need to stop oversharing with the MIL, and she needs to give them space.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

Another mom shares her experience with her MIL.

This person thinks she handled the situation well.

A grandmother weighs in.

This is an interesting way of thinking about it.

I agree. They need to set boundaries now.

This is good advice.

Her mother-in-law needs to back off before they cut her off.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.