I can only imagine how hard it would be to watch your mom suffer with cancer multiple times, end up passing away, and then seeing your dad in a relationship with a new woman.

It would probably be really hard to accept that he was with someone new.

That’s the situation in this story, which is told by the dad’s new partner, a bartender who has a trust fund and is misunderstood by the daughters.

Let’s see how the story plays out.

AITA for not being friendly with my partners daughters now that they’ve “warmed up” to me

I’m (42) dating Tim (59), a widower. He’s in banking, I’m a bartender.

I know what it looks like. His 2 daughters thought the same thing, but he’s broke as a joke and I’ve got a trust fund, so actually no.

He’s broke because his late wife got cancer. 3 times.

He ran up 6 credit cards, 2nd mortgage on the house, cashed out his retirement, everything and anything to get her the treatment she needed and then to get treatment enough to see both daughters married.

I’m sure it’s hard for the daughters to accept that there’s a new woman in their dad’s life.

His daughters live 6hrs drive away.

We drove to them for Xmas last year and the year before.

They ignored me, dragged Tim away when he tried to include me and prevented their husbands from making even small talk with me by talking over me.

Year 1 Tim chastised them, they apologized (to him, not me) They blamed the pain of seeing their Dad with a woman who wasn’t their Mum.

Year 2, they did it again.

She doesn’t want to visit Tim’s daughters this year.

This year I told Tim not again. He could go, I would never ask him not to see his daughters for Xmas but I’ll stay here.

Tim didn’t love the idea because me going with him means we can share the responsibility of driving when his back starts to bother him. (He hates to fly)

His 2010 deathtrap is starting to go anyway, so I leased him a comfy luxury ride (my brother has a dealership)

He called the girls, super excited that he’d be able to see them more often without having to worry about his back,, who then blew up and accused him of spending their Mothers money on a “bull**** house and car to impress some bimbo bartender and didn’t offer them a dime for their weddings”

The daughters didn’t know the reality of the situation.

In the ensuing argument it came out that they assumed there had been a life insurance policy, nor did they have any idea about the credit card debt or the 2nd mortgage that the house was underwater on or that Tim was looking at foreclosure and bankruptcy until he moved in with me.

They did not realize it was my house, that he pays no bills save the water bill (man takes excessive showers) and shared groceries.

Now the girls want my number. They are sorry I “felt lonely” at Xmas.

They want to come visit and stay with us next year! Conveniently in summer, I live near a beach.

She doesn’t want to be friends with Tim’s daughters.

I’ve told Tim absolutely not about giving out my number. I’m happy to be polite if they come to visit Tim but, we’re not going to be friends.

If they had talked to me for even 2 seconds they’d have understood. I am not shy about admitting the only thing I have ever contributed to my blessed financial state is “not developing a crippling coke addiction” like my cousin Danny did.

Tim thinks I’m being too unforgiving. They would have warmed up to me eventually but knowing how generous I am being with their Father has made them warm up quicker.

I maintain I don’t care about now or later, they had their chance to not be catty brats over incorrect assumptions that I was taking advantage of him.

It sounds like the daughters only warmed up to her because of her money. She definitely shouldn’t let them get too close.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

This is something worth thinking about.

Yes, this is definitely why they’re being nice.

This person finds it concerning that her partner didn’t tell his daughters the truth a long time ago.

They sound really selfish.

They only care about her because they found out she has money.

If you liked that story, check out this post about an oblivious CEO who tells a web developer to “act his wage”… and it results in 30% of the workforce being laid off.