Family relationships can be complicated and sometimes deeply painful.

One young woman struggled for years after her mother abruptly abandoned the family.

So when her mother unexpectedly called on her birthday, she froze, unsure if she should answer. And when her boyfriend shamed her hesitance, she felt even more alone than before.

Read on for the full story.

AITA for not picking up my mother’s call?

Three years ago, my mother abandoned me and my father on a random day.

She left behind 25 years of married life and two daughters just to return to her childhood lover.

Her’s mothers attitude made the sting even more intense.

It was traumatic because she showed no signs of sadness. She acted normal with me and my sister.

I don’t know what was going on with my father, but she was completely normal with others.

It was hard, but her and the rest of the family somehow managed to pick up the pieces.

One morning, she left home saying she had some work and never returned.

It was a heck of a ride for me and my family. Anyhow, we settled in, and my parents got divorced six months ago.

Then one day came a call from her mother, and she didn’t expect to react the way she did.

Last month, after three long years of total no contact, she called me on my birthday. I was on a trip with my boyfriend.

My whole body froze seeing her number. She called me twice.

Despite pressure from those close to her, she didn’t want to speak to her mother.

My boyfriend insisted I answer, but I didn’t.

I couldn’t. Something inside me stopped me from answering that call. I haven’t called her back yet.

AITA?

Abandonment can leave scars that can take years to heal.

What did Reddit think?

This person’s reaction was completely normal and expected.

If her boyfriend can’t understand, then he shouldn’t pretend to.

The decision regarding whether or not to engage is 100% hers to make.

She deserves to decide how she wants to handle this situation.

In life, not everyone deserves a second chance — at least not until they prove themselves first.

If you liked that post, check out this post about a woman who tracked down a contractor who tried to vanish without a trace.