Imagine having a niece who needs somewhere to live while her mom focuses on cleaning up her life. If you agreed to take her in, would you let her call you “Mom,” or would you insist on being her aunt, since that is what you are?

In this story, one woman is in this exact situation, and she chooses the second option.

The problem is that her friends won’t accept that she’s the aunt and not the mom since she’s doing everything a mom would do.

When her sister overheard, the drama escalated quickly.

Let’s read the whole story.

AITA for not correcting my friend when she called me “Grandma”?

I(33F) took in my niece(21F) when she was 13. My niece lived with my mom, who passed from cancer and I was given custody until my sister(38F) could be reevaluated.

She had lost custody due to drug addiction.

CPS cleared my sister for custody, but she had relapsed as a coping mechanism when we lost our mom so my niece stayed with me.

She made sure her niece knew she wasn’t her mom.

Now, I never let my niece call me Mom. I was her aunt.

I would provide for her. I wanted her to know I had her back and she could tell me anything, there would be no judgement, just support.

My friends would refer to her as my daughter and I would correct them and say she’s my niece, but my friends would respond, “Say what you want, but you’re her mom.”

I would just brush them off, albeit with a bit of pride in myself.

This is great news!

My niece had a daughter this year, and my sister is back in her life. She’s been clean for 2 years and in recovery.

She wants to be the grandma that our mom could never be to my niece because she had to raise her instead.

I think this is great and I am excited to finally be the cool aunt.

Her friends were joking around.

We had a party at my house recently and my friend asks “How’s my favorite GILF doing?” Using the acronym for Mother I’d Like to F*** but replacing the Mother with Grandma.

I answered her question, the conversation moves on, and the party continues.

Afterwards, my sister approaches me and asks why my friend called me a GILF.

And I say they have jokingly called me a Grandma ever since we found out my niece was pregnant.

Her sister was really upset.

She made a face of disgust stating, “But you’re not a grandmother. I’m baby’s name’s grandma. You’re just her aunt.”

I replied, “I know that but I was just excited to see her I guess, it wasn’t a priority to remind her.” I shrugged it off trying to imply it wasn’t a big deal but my sister did not let it go.

“Well I find that rude considering I was right there. I’m the grandmother. You should have said something.”

My niece overheard and tried to tell her that it wasn’t a big deal and that they were my friends and they always said stuff like that.

Her niece is trying to help, but it only makes it worse.

When my sister asked for her to explain, my niece told her about how they referred to my niece as my daughter.

This only upset her more, “She’s not your daughter. She is my daughter. I made the hard decision to let her stay with you because you could give her things that I never could but that does not make you her mother.”

My niece still tried to defend me but my sister wouldn’t hear any of it. She took the baby in her carseat and went outside to wait for my niece to go home as she had gotten a ride to my house from her.

I gave my niece a hug goodbye and told her not to worry about it, that my sister would get over it.

Her sister is still upset.

It’s been a few weeks, she has not responded to my messages.

I can’t help but feel she’s making a mountain out of a molehill.

I don’t want her to think I’m trying to take her spot. She has worked hard to get where she’s at and I’m happy for her progress.

Should I have just corrected my friend like I always do?

So AITA?

I can see why her sister is upset, but it’s not OP who is calling herself “grandma.” It was her friends.

Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story.

It’s really up to the niece who she considers her mother and her baby’s grandmother.

Here’s a suggestion for therapy.

Her sister really should be grateful her daughter didn’t end up in foster care.

She might just need to be patient with her sister.

Another person points out why OP really was her niece’s mother.

Being a mother is about more than just who gave birth.

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