Things happen in life where you sometimes grow apart from family, and that can make seeing them again kind of awkward.

What would you do if you hadn’t seen your extended family for years, but now everyone is getting together?

That is what the young man in this story is dealing with, and he doesn’t want to go because it would be awkward.

WIBTA for not visiting my great-grandmother’s possibly final Christmas?

I (19M) have had ups and downs with my “distant” side of the family.

It is sad when family is estranged.

I’m very close to my mother’s side of the family, since borrowing my dad, we have no contact whatsoever with my father’s side of the family since they did awful things to both my dad and my mom.

Meaning that all of this relates to my mom’s side.

At least he seems close with mom’s side of the family.

Before Covid, every once or twice a year I’d go visit my great-grandmother, who lives in a small town of 5000 people. In that town I have 2 cousins (15F and 18M) who before Covid I used to hang out with a lot when I’d go to my great-grandmother’s town.

My 18M cousin does live in the town, my 15F one didn’t.

People grow up and grow apart sometimes.

However, she did make friendships within the town. Meanwhile, I always stood out since outside of my family I never really made friends in the town.

This wasn’t a big problem since I’d usually hang out with them, but once we became a bit older, they began to be with their friends, and I’d just stay at the family house.

COVID was a difficult time.

At 13, Covid hit, and thus due to obvious reasons we didn’t visit the town in the whole of 2020 and 2021. In 2022 we also didn’t visit, but in 2023 we did go visit my great-grandmother.

I went with my grandparents, but I didn’t notify my cousins at all about it, because I’m going to be honest, after almost 3 years of no contact, I felt awkward talking to them again.

He doesn’t have an obligation to tell people he is visiting, I guess.

I also didn’t tell my uncles and aunts, cause I also hadn’t talked to them in 3 years.

However, it appears that they found out about my trip, and they apparently didn’t like that I just chose not to see them.

Not inviting them does seem rude, and it cuts out the possibility of gifts!

This got even worse in 2025 when I graduated from highschool, where I didn’t invite anyone from my family other than my parents and my grandparents.

This also didn’t sit well with them, and my grandmother told me that my extended family had decided to not invite me to my cousin’s one in 2026.

She may not have long left, sadly.

This year, my great-grandmother’s health has been going downhill. She’s 98, quite an old lady, and she has been in constant need of care.

I hadn’t spent Christmas with my extended family since I believe 2018, and I hadn’t seen them since 2019.

It is time to end any drama and spend time with family.

One part of me would like to go, cause I’m not sure if I’ll ever see my great-grandmother ever again, even if we aren’t extremely close, she’s a sweet lady who I’ll always respect and love.

On the other hand, I really don’t want to be in an extremely awkward spot, since my extended family and my cousins know that I have been trying to avoid them for these past 5 years for no reason whatsoever.

This is no reason not to see family.

And the worst part is that indeed, I’ve been trying to do so with no particular reason other than because I’d find interacting with them awkward after such a long time.

My parents and grandparents will obviously go, meaning that in case I choose to not go, I’d literally be the only family member missing for no apparent reason.

Absolutely, it would be selfish.

I already told my parents and they said that even if they can’t force me to come now that I’m over 18, they would find it a bit selfish of me to just not show up.

WIBTA?

Yes. Sometimes, enduring awkward situations in life is just part of living, he needs to suck it up and go see his family.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say about it.

Yup, suck it up young man.

There is nothing stopping him.

Yeah, things will just get worse if he doesn’t go.

100% agree with this commenter.

He will regret it if he doesn’t go.

Part of life is dealing with discomfort.

Get over it.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.