Every adult eventually reaches the moment in their life when they have to choose their own traditions rather than just sticking to the old ones.

So when a man told his mother he and his girlfriend were traveling abroad for Christmas, she met his decision with guilt trips, dramatics, and accusations that made him question everything.

Read on for the full story.

AITA for choosing not to spend Christmas with my family, but instead with my GF

I, for the past year, have been seriously dating a girl that I love very much and am looking to wife.

During this year, we had some rough times with our families. My mom is very keen on family traditions while she and her parents aren’t.

His family dynamic looks a little different nowadays, but for the most part, he’s made peace with it.

For context, my parents are divorced, but my mom has had a serious BF for years now (very cool guy, fatherly figure of mine), and she was therefore able to at least get to something close to a real family (me too), since my dad is most def an AH.

Last few Christmases have been the closest me and my mom could get to a real happy family Christmas.

I appreciate the time and also aim to keep in touch with mom and her BF as much as I can. I visit them every week, occasionally go to the countryside with them, etc. I’m a good son, overall.

But when he started thinking about spending Christmas somewhere else this year, that’s when conflict began to brew.

Now the beef began when me and my GF decided to spend Christmas together, traveling abroad.

Easter was kind of a mess this year — we traveled to the countryside to meet both families, my GF didn’t enjoy it, and it was tiring.

So we were like “Forget it, Christmas will be just ours this year.”

His mom was 100% against this idea and lays on the guilt pretty thick.

My mom, on the other hand, went mad as expected, blaming me for leaving her alone, for taking away her Christmas, started moaning that she’s going old and won’t be here for much longer (she’s only 51, btw), etc.

He views family time very differently than she does.

For further context — I also support quality family time, it’s healthy when done in moderation, but I don’t really care about certain dates.

No matter if it’s Dec 24th or 28th, we’re still family and could spend good time together, which I plan on doing.

He’s disappointed that she reacted this way and doesn’t know how to move forward.

All my life she always went about how she’s open-minded, cool, and supportive and she failed on the first legit hurdle.

So, AITA?

He was just trying to build a life with someone he loves, and sometimes that’s going to mean forging their own path.

What did Reddit think?

Just because the Christmas holiday isn’t important to him, doesn’t mean it can’t be important to his mother.

Obligations aren’t always fun, but they are necessary for maintaining strong familial bonds.

On the other hand, maybe his mother is being a little too dramatic.

Sometimes parents have trouble letting go of their kids, even after they’re grown.

At some point, parents have to accept their children’s lives won’t always orbit around them.

If his mother can’t give him room to grow, she might end up pushing him far further away than a Christmas trip ever could.

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