Being busy doesn’t always mean you’re unavailable, but some people treat it that way anyway.

So, what would you do if your family had Christmas dinner planned later in the day, but you also wanted to see a friend you rarely get to spend time with and attend a weekly class you never miss? Would you cancel some of the plans? Or would you arrange your schedule to make room for everything?

In the following story, one adult daughter chooses the latter, but her mother is still upset. Here’s what happened.

AITA for seeing friends/going to other things the day of my family’s Christmas dinner?

So I (late 20s f) live with my parents/sister.

My family has two separate celebrations for Christmas every year- one where we have my brother and SIL over, and another on another day where we have the whole family over.

One of my friends has just moved back into the area, and I hadn’t seen her in a while, so I suggested we meet up again on a particular morning – I’m busy, and if I don’t do that day, I won’t be able to see her for a while.

Later that same day, I had a dance class I attend weekly.

Her mother and sister were not happy about it.

I mentioned that I was going to meet up with her and some other friends. My mother, who was unhappy, reminded me we had Christmas dinner with my brother and told me she had wanted my help that day, getting ready.

Her wanting help is reasonable, but I would be back in the mid-afternoon at the latest, leaving me several hours to help her out. She’s still not thrilled.

I later mentioned to my sister that I would still be going to dance that evening (it would be at the tail end of dinner, and they’d still be there when I got back afterwards), and she clearly wasn’t happy about that either.

Just so we’re clear, I would be around to help in the afternoon and there for dinner in the evening (my sister will be around to help her as well), and we have the main Christmas dinner later in the week, which I would be around to help with anything necessary for.

AITA?

Eek! It seems like she has time to do everything, so it shouldn’t be a big deal.

Let’s see what the people over at Reddit have to say about it.

This reader stands up for her.

Yet another person who thinks she’s an adult who can choose.

For this person, it’s rude to leave dinner.

Here’s someone who needs more information.

If she has time, she shouldn’t stress.

So rather than argue about it, she should just show her mom and sister.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.