Families are complex and often tight-knit units that it can take time for outsiders to fully integrate into.

But sometimes the families are open and welcoming, and the individual themselves are the problem instead.

That was certainly the case for the family in this story, who welcomed the younger brother’s fiancée with open arms.

But when her behavior wasn’t a good fit, the older brother decided to take action.

Read on to find out why it was too little, too late.

AITA for confronting my brother about his fiancée a couple of days before his wedding?

Back in 2019, I met my younger brother’s fiancée for the first time. At the time she was 21.

Now I’m 32, my brother is 29, and his fiancée is 25.

The first time we met, she was meeting my parents for the first time as well. They came down to my parents’ lake house for my brother to introduce her (let’s call her Emily).

Immediately, I heard her yelling at him because she didn’t want his help for whatever reason and wanted to do it herself (so already I did not view her in the kindest of lights).

But things got worse over that weekend.

My wife and I asked them if they would like to go jet skiing so we could have some fun and get to know each other alone on the lake.

We rode, then stopped to chat. Emily asked my wife (who has a tattoo on each thigh) if my parents ever mention them, due to my parents’ religious beliefs.

My wife responded, “Not anymore.” As we are respectful, she covered up the tattoos until we discussed them with my parents, and enough time passed that it was acceptable.

Emily then responded, “I dare them to say something about my tattoos, I’ll cuss them out.” Awesome first impression!

Yikes! Let’s see what happened down the line to make things worse in this family.

Now we jump to late 2021, when I was a groomsman for my brother’s upcoming wedding. No one, and I mean NO ONE, had nice things to say about Emily.

My grandmother said to me days prior, “I wish he wasn’t marrying her,” to which I replied, “I know, Grandma. But we at least have to be happy for him.”

This broke me. For years, I have heard how his friends don’t hang out with him. His best man (also his best friend) doesn’t want to be near her because she is toxic.

I confront my wife to see if I should talk to him about it. I was visibly scared of the repercussions.

Read on to find out what he decided to do.

We decided that his best man and I would take him to a cigar bar two days before the wedding to voice our concerns.

Looking back, it was sort of an ambush because he was locked in the truck with us.

I did the classic, “Hey, don’t take offense” tactic, and prefaced that the things we are about to say are not the best things to say about his soon-to-be wife.

We discussed what others had been saying about her.

Let’s see what they had to say.

The best man expressed how they were practically brothers, but Emily had driven a wedge between them and was very unwelcoming to him and his other friends.

I want to point out my brother lived with my parents, going to school, but he became super depressed, quit school, and inevitably moved back to where we used to live to be around his friends.

I talked about how many members of our family find her very immature and disrespectful (I have never told him what our grandma said).

Obviously, this made the car ride to and fro very uncomfortable.

Read on to find out how his younger brother responded to the situation.

He didn’t really say anything (Typical of him. He is the kind of person to never speak up and just… never talk about it ever).

The wedding happened.

They placed my parents to the side of the groom’s party table, and my older brother (also a groomsman) voiced his concerns to her, and she violently shouted at him and kicked him out.

She also told my wife not to be pregnant at the wedding.

AITA?

It definitely wasn’t the best time or place for this older brother to confess his concerns about his younger brother’s fiancée – and the tension between everyone at the wedding was a direct result of that.

But not saying anything could have been problematic too.

He really was in a sticky situation – as was the younger brother, who was thoughtlessly ambushed in the days before his wedding.

Let’s see what the Reddit community said about this.

This person thought that he’d done the right thing.

But others thought he’d delivered the news in exactly the wrong way.

Meanwhile, this Redditor thought that talking about it four years after the fact showed that this guy was problematic too.

Sure, voice your feelings if you think someone is in trouble or something untoward might be going on.

But waiting until just before his wedding was unfair – he had years to speak up beforehand.

As it is, he might just have to let his relationship with his brother go.

He’s made his alliances clear.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.