Offering unsolicited advice is a natural part of every relationship, but it can turn into controlling behavior.

In this case, a man shares how he pointed out to his girlfriend that using four out of six available washing machines in her building could inconvenience others.

Would you do that?

She disagrees that it would inconvenience others and feels judged, and now he’s wondering if he’s wrong.

Let’s read the whole story.

AITA for telling my girlfriend that she’s inconveniencing others for using 4 out of 6 washing machines?

Today my girlfriend did laundry in her building, which has 6 washing machines and 6 dryers on her floor.

She lives in a large dorm building that houses maybe 50ish people on her floor.

My girlfriend likes to separate her clothes into whites, colors, delicate whites, and delicate colors.

This means when she does all her laundry at once, it takes up 4 of the 6 washing machines.

We were on the phone this morning and while we were talking, she said that she was separating her clothes like this and using 4 washers.

But he was concerned about something.

Now, I’m the kind of person that just puts all of he laundry together (this is all relevant I promise).

I do this not necessarily to save washer space. If I have a ton of clothes, I’ll use multiple washers.

I just think that having to separate lights and darks is an outdated practice from when detergents would cause bleeding/fading, which modern detergents don’t in my experience.

They discussed the subject.

She insisted that separating her clothes helps keep them looking new and that her clothes need more care than mine because they are different materials.

Since her anecdotal experience conflicts with my anecdotal experience, I just decided to move on, but the conversation did leave some lingering tension.

I don’t remember how exactly I said it, but I expressed that she can do it her way, but using 4 washers is kinda a lot.

She felt that she had to explain herself.

I wasn’t trying to guilt her into consolidating, I was just trying to get her to recognize that she is taking up a decent amount of space to do this which is inconvenient for others.

I would’ve moved on if she said something like “Yeah I know it’s a lot of washers but I don’t want to wait a long time doing multiple loads.”

To me, this seems like the most honest description of her motivations.

But instead, she insists that it’s not inconveniencing anyone, and that she doesn’t want to spend the entire day doing laundry.

He wasn’t happy with her explanation.

She got very upset saying that I’m attacking her character by calling her “a selfish prick.”

I never called her that, and I explained that I don’t think she’s a terrible awful person for taking up 4/6 washers.

I’m just bothered that she refuses to say it inconveniences others. I tried my best to understand her and explain myself respectfully.

They ended up arguing.

Here’s a text from me: “It just bothers me that you refuse to accept that the way you’re doing laundry is inconvenient for others.”

“You should just admit that you know it inconveniences others but you still do it anyway because it’s convenient for you.”

“Don’t try to justify it any other way. You don’t NEED any other justification.”

“To me, it sounds dishonest when you use other justifications.”

She explained herself again, and now he’s wondering if he’s in the wrong.

Her most compelling argument to me is that she was doing laundry at 11am on a sunday which is a low traffic time, even in a high-density dorm building.

Washer cycles take 30 minutes and dryer takes 28 minutes.

Since she didn’t see anyone waiting for her, she took it as confirmation that she wasn’t inconveniencing anyone.

Others on her floor seem to agree with her. I let my gf read this before posting, btw.

AITA?

He sounds exhausting.

Let’s see what Reddit had to say.

This person thinks he’s in the wrong.

Exactly.

Something to consider.

I’m surprised he didn’t yell “it’s the principle!”

Yikes.

Why does he care so much?

Micromanaging your partner never improves the relationship.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.